


Table, rocket, drama, bother

by Ragno



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Christmas, Explicit Sexual Content, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Sonia Kaspbrak's A+ Parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2019-12-15
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:01:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21807109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ragno/pseuds/Ragno
Summary: Thinking back Eddie should have known something like this could happen. He could try to convince himself it seemed like a good idea at first, but the truth is he didn’t even think about it at all. He was just pissed. And he had the right to be pissed too, thank you very much. It was just… he hated going back home for Christmas.
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Patricia Blum Uris/Stanley Uris
Comments: 56
Kudos: 566
Collections: IT Fandom Secret Santa 2019





	Table, rocket, drama, bother

**Author's Note:**

  * For [marsisaplanet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/marsisaplanet/gifts).



> So this is my part for the 2019 IT Secret Santa! I've never done this before, so I hope I followed the rules right. Merry Christmas, [marsisaplanetyall](https://marsisaplanetyall.tumblr.com/)! I hope I didn't screw this up!

Thinking back Eddie should have known something like this could happen. He could try to convince himself it seemed like a good idea at first, but the truth is he didn’t even think about it at all. He was just pissed. And he had the right to be pissed too, thank you very much. It was just… he hated going back home for Christmas. As much as college was the primary source of crippling anxiety for Eddie (he needed rules! Where the fuck were the rules?? Why were people walking around in their pajamas? Why were some of those people professors?? High school didn’t prepare him for _this_ ), it was also his primary source of freedom.

It wasn’t like that at first. The two first years of college were actually a nightmare for Eddie. The only reason he applied for the further ones he could find was that he needed to get the hell out of his house and, especially, he needed to get the hell away from his mom. She wasn’t a bad person, okay? She was just… too much. Eddie understood she married young and her family became her whole life because that’s how she thought it had to be. She stopped having friends and even lost contact with her family just so she could be the perfect wife, so when Eddie’s dad died, she just… she was lost. She couldn’t be a devoted wife so she decided she would be a devoted mom. And that’s how fast-forwarding twenty years later Eddie took his mom’s hands in his and looked at her in the eyes and told her she needed to go back home. He loved her, he really did, and he did appreciate her efforts at being a good, loving, caring mother, but who the fuck decides to move in with their kid when they go off to college??

He lasted two years. Two whole years living with his mom in a rented apartment close to campus so Eddie could ‘play with friends whenever he wanted to’. Two whole years waking up early, kissing his mom’s cheek before going to class, and getting the third degree if he came home later than 6 p.m. No parties, no social life, some friends because he wasn’t a total freak, and a lot of teasing coming for said friends because they were assholes and Eddie hated them but also loved them very much, that was college life for Eddie the first two years until he said no more.

He didn’t know how he did it, maybe he really looked desperate or maybe his mom was tired of living in a big, unfamiliar city, but she finally gave in and left, and Eddie joined his friends living on campus. And he. Went. Crazy. He did everything he would have done in the past two years in the period of like a semester. He went to parties, he did a kegstand, threw up immediately after, swore he’d never drink again, drank again, tried to get into a fraternity, realized he didn’t want to be in a fucking fraternity, made out with a girl, had his cock sucked in a bathroom, lasted incredibly longer than he thought he would, made out with a boy, creamed his pants, realized the only reason he lasted that long while getting that one blowjob was because he was gay as fuck, and came out. First to his roommate Stan, who just looked up from the book he was reading and gave him a thumbs-up, then to the rest of his friends, who showed a little more excitement than Stan but not a lot (they probably had seen it coming), and last to his mom.

He did it right before Christmas break, over the phone, days before coming back home. Let’s say the decorating of the Christmas tree went a little more awkward than usual. Sonia took it better than Eddie expected, though. At least when they went to church to celebrate baby Jesus’ birthday she didn’t try to pray the gay away from him (or so he hoped). She did try to convince him he was ‘too young’ and had ‘too little experience’ to know for sure what he was into, and maybe he hadn’t found the right girl yet. He tried to explain the best he could he just didn’t find girls attractive at all, in any sense. He even talked about Patty and told her she was the most amazing girl he had ever met, awesome friend, better person (yeah, she was also Stan’s girlfriend, but his mom didn’t need to know that). If Eddie liked girls he would be in love with her already. Just thinking about it made him sick in his stomach.

“She doesn’t sound like that great of a person,” his mom said, wrinkling his nose. “Of course there would be a lot of girls you won’t like that way, Eddie-bear. In fact, I never liked any boys before I met your dad. He was the only one for me and I knew right away there would be no other. When the right person comes, you know it.”

“Sure, Ma,” Eddie nodded. He couldn’t tell her he had to think about his history teacher from eighth grade to get off after almost half an hour of a pretty decent blowjob, could he? Poor Lisa Goodman must have had a sore jaw for weeks after that.

So the next year he slowed down again and focused on, you know, getting a Bachelor’s Degree and those kinds of things you’re expected to actually do in college. He also discovered he wasn’t really that much into partying and doing a lot of crazy stuff. It did look exciting at first, mostly because he had been all his life looking at that kind of life from behind a glass, thinking about how great would it be to just be free to do whatever the hell he wanted too. It turned out a few months of total freedom were enough to make Eddie go back into a safe, predictable, routine. He was still gay, though, and he still hated going home for Christmas.

“I need to come up with something so I can stay here for Christmas this break,” Eddie said, sitting down next to Stan and looking at him. Stan gave him a look through the corner of his eye and made a face, looking back at the book he had open on his desk along with his laptop. He had some kind of test he needed to study for.

“Why would you want to stay here? Everybody is leaving,” Stan said, looking at Eddie when he made an obvious noise. “Oh, right.”

“I’m not in the mood to go through that again,” Eddie rested his face on his palm, leaning on the desk and looking at Stan. “Help?”

“Tell your mom you don’t want to go,” Stan suggested. Eddie didn’t know if he should laugh or just shoot himself. “What?”

“Dude, are you serious? I can’t just tell her I don’t wanna go! What would your parents think if you told them you don’t want to spend Hanukkah with them?”

“I don’t usually spend Hanukkah with my parents unless it falls on Christmas break. Oh, sorry, ‘ _Holiday_ ’ break,” Stand sarcastically corrected himself, making the quotation marks with his fingers.

“Well, I can’t just tell my mom I don’t wanna go home for Christmas. She’d kill me. She’d come here and kill me with her bare hands and then drag me back home and spend Christmas with my rotten body sitting on the table.”

“Well, that just sounds lovely…”

“I can tell her I’m spending Christmas with you this year,” Eddie’s face illuminated. Stan looked at him like he didn’t just want to roll his eyes but his whole face.

“Jewish, remember? You just talked about Hanukkah. Like, seconds ago.”

“Shit, you’re right.” Eddie rubbed his face. He needed to think about something. “Fuck, I don’t know what to do.”

“I bet you’ll come up with something,” Stand said, not even looking at him anymore and going back to his laptop. “Now, if you don’t mind.”

It was nice to have a friend who believed in him more than Eddie believed in himself, to be honest. However, Stan was too much of a logical man to help Eddie come up with some twisted, stupid excuse not to go home, so he was no help whatsoever. Eddie thought about asking Bill, too. Bill had been friends with Stan since orientation day and they shared a bunch of classes, he also was the one holding Eddie’s legs while he was trying to drink beer upside down and not to die at the same time. Bill usually had great ideas, but because of that Eddie kind of admired him too much to ask for help and show him how much of a pussy he was not wanting to tell his mom the truth.

So inevitably the weekend came and Sonia called (Eddie had managed to convince his mom a call once a week was just enough) and Eddie found himself facing his worse fears with absolutely no backup at all.

“… and you shouldn’t be eating those awful things they serve at the cafeteria. You know your mom’s cooking is the best you can get, honey. I shouldn’t have left you there all alone, Eddie. God knows what you had been putting in your body,” Eddie covered the phone so he could sigh and roll his eyes at the same time. “Anyway, you’re coming home soon so you’ll be enjoying your mommy’s Christmas food! I’m so happy, Eddie.”

“Mom… I actually,” Eddie made a face. Fuck. It was now or never. “I don’t think I can go home this time,” he said, bracing himself for what was about to come.

“What?” Here we go. “Why? Eddie, are you okay? Baby, are you ill? Didn’t you get the tickets on time? I can come get you, Eddie. Tell me what’s wrong, honey!”

“No. Mom. Mom, listen, I’m fine. I just…”

“You don’t love me anymore, Eddie? Is that what you’re saying? You’re ashamed of your mommy and you don’t want to come back home? Is your home so little to you now?”

“Mom! I’m not…” Eddie felt desperate, looking around like his room would help him find the perfect excuse somehow. Stan’s stupid bird posters didn’t help. “Look. I _do_ want to go, I’m eager to go back home, okay? I miss you _so much_.” He hoped his voice didn’t sound as fake as it felt. “But I can’t because… uh…”

And that, right there, Eddie had the worst idea ever.

“I have a boyfriend!” Shit. Eddie opened his eyes wide and covered his mouth with his hand. Shit.

“You have a what?” His mom’s voice was quiet, careful. Eddie took a deep breath. Relax. This might work.

“A boyfriend, Ma. And he’s… uh. His parents aren’t home for Christmas. Like, they travel a lot. And I feel bad, and I don’t want him to be all alone for Christmas, so I want to be there for him, mom. Like, you said you know the moment you find the right person and I know he is. I think he is. And I can’t leave him all alone for Christmas, Ma. You wouldn’t have let dad spend Christmas alone, right?” That was so low, such a despicable thing to say to his poor mother. Eddie crossed his fingers and hoped it worked.

“Oh, Eddie… I don’t know what to say,” his mom sounded confused. Confused could be good, Eddie could work with confused. “You should’ve told me, Eddie-bear.”

“I know. I know, Ma, but I thought maybe you wouldn’t approve since last time we talked about it you insisted so much in me trying to find the _right girl_ …” He took the opportunity to let that slip too.

“You’re sure he’s the one, Eddie?” Sonia asked him. Eddie took a second to think about it. He wasn’t the one, of course, due to the little fact that he didn’t exist, but there would be a ‘ _the one’_ someday, and Eddie was smart enough not to talk about any specific guy to his mom until he found that one, so.

“Yeah, I think so,” he said in his best good boy voice. “I love him, mommy.” Such a liar. He was glad he stopped believing in God long ago because shit like this would send him straight to hell.

“Okay,” Sonia finally said, “okay, Eddie, I understand.” Eddie threw his fist in the air. Yes! “You can bring him too.”

Wait, what.

“What??” His whole body got alert and he almost drops the phone.

“You can bring him home for Christmas. If he’s the one, Eddie, then I want to meet him. And I don’t want my future son-in-law to be alone for Christmas either. This is a time to be with family, Eddie.” Eddie didn’t know what to say, he was mouthing like a fish out of water. “I’ll send you the tickets, honey.”

“But Ma!”

“No need to argue, Eddie. I’m just doing what any loving mother would do. I’ll email you the tickets soon. Now I need to get the guest room ready. I’m willing to accept your style of life, but we’re still a Christian home, so no funny games around the house, okay?” Eddie wanted to answer, he wanted to say something, but his mom kept talking before he could think of anything at all. “I’ll talk to you later, honey. I can’t wait to have you home!”

*

“I’m not pretending to be your boyfriend,” Stan said, not even looking at Eddie.

“I haven’t asked you!” Eddie said, looking away when Stan looked at him. “…yet. I mean, Stan, come on! I need your help.”

“And what do you suggest I tell Patty? Stan said sarcastically, “Sorry, honey, I won’t spend the holiday break with you because I need to take a flight to the other side of the country to trick a middle-aged woman into thinking I’m dating his son.”

“You make it sound worse than it is…” Eddie muttered. He already knew Stan would say no before even bringing it up, but he needed to try. He was that desperate. “There must be someone who does these kinds of things, right? Like, someone must have invented some kind of Tinder app but for, like, fake relationship.”

“Some would say those Tinder-like apps already provide fake relationships,” Stan said, making Eddie roll his eyes because he didn’t need that kind of condescendence right now. Stan looked at him. “I don’t think a lot of people feel the need to use that kind of service. Most of them just probably, you know… meet someone and date them for real.”

“You’re not helping me right now, Stanley.”

“Okay, look,” Stan put down his cellphone and paid full attention to Eddie (finally). “You could always ask Bill. I bet he’d do it."

“I can’t ask _Bill!_ I respect him!” Eddie replied, and he immediately regretted it when Stan looked at him shocked. “I mean. I don’t want him to know I’m lame. You already know I am…”

“I won’t even… I’ll pretend I haven’t heard that.” Stan held his hand up, shaking his head. “You don’t want Bill to know? Fine. I won’t do it either, so you’re out of friends who would do this shit for you, meaning you’ll have to ask a stranger. I won’t recommend that, but then again, I won’t recommend lying to your mom about having a boyfriend in the first place.” He gave Eddie a dirty look. “First person that comes to my mind is Ben. He’s the sweetest guy I know. In fact, I bet your mom would force you to date him for real if you bring him home.”

“Ben in like, Bill’s roommate Ben? Doesn’t he have a girlfriend?”

“That’s the point. He’s been dating Beverly like forever, and he’s too much of a good guy to do it, even if I’m pretty sure Beverly wouldn’t mind. And, speaking of Beverly…”

“No,” Eddie said before Stan could keep talking. He knew what Stan was going to say and there was no way, no way…

“He would do it! You know he would! He’s weird like that. He’s the kind of guy you think about when people talk about doing these kinds of things!”

“I won’t pretend to date Richie fucking Tozier!”

Richie Tozier was Beverly’s BFF (his words, not Eddie’s). They were always together, they had been friends since they were kids, so much they applied to the same colleges just to keep being joined at the hip. This information was of public knowledge because Richie would tell anyone who asked (and anyone who didn’t too). Richie liked to talk. He shared a couple of classes with Eddie, so Eddie knew. He was also loud and obnoxious and the kind of person you don’t want by your side if you’ve had a bad night of sleep and you want the world to be as quiet as possible. Richie had never bothered Eddie though, he had never talked to him, actually. Except for one of the first days of class, when Richie sat beside him and asked him if he could borrow a pen because he forgot to bring one. That resumed pretty much what kind of a disaster Richie was.

At first, Eddie thought Richie and Beverly were together. It was difficult to see any of them without the other one. But then Eddie met Bill, and Bill introduced him to Ben. Ben was probably the total opposite of Richie. He was kind and thoughtful and caring, and Eddie didn’t understand how Beverly could like that kind of guy to be his boyfriend and have the fucking Tasmanian Devil from the Looney Toons as her best friend.

“I’m just saying at least you already know him. He’s not your friend, but he’s friends with your friends, so that’s slightly better than asking a total stranger. You could easily get Beverly to kick his ass if he does anything you don’t want him to. And you could frame it as some kind of bet. I’ve seen him smoke a rosemary blunt for ten bucks.”

“You want me to pay him??”

“I’m just saying you could ask! I mean, how bad could it be?”

Eddie should have known nothing good comes after a question like that.

*

The holiday break was just around the corner, so Eddie needed to do things fast. A couple of days after he talked to his mom he received an email with two plane tickets to go home, so the damage was done. That’s the only reason why he accepted to go to an open mike night where, _ugh_ , Richie Tozier had some kind of act. He didn’t really know what it was about, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to know either. It was Stan who convinced him to go, but then he conveniently wriggled out of the situation claiming he had plans with Patricia.

“You go with Bill, act like you’re there because you want to just hang out. It’s actually better I’m not going. I could give away your plans.”

Yeah, sure. It had nothing to do with how everybody performing at that fucking place was absolutely awful. Honestly, did people have no sense of self-consciousness at all?

“I’m glad you came, Eddie. You sh-should have fun now and then. Spending s-so much time with Stan can’t be good,” Bill joked. Eddie smiled. He did feel self-conscious hanging out with Bill. He was like the coolest guy Eddie had ever met, not like in a conventional sense of the word, but in like Bill was someone Eddie could look up too. Bill was brave and determined and he always knew what to do, he was the kind of guy you know will have his life figured out by the time he’s out of college.

“I’ve had enough parties to last a lifetime already,” Eddie laughed. “But this is nice. People here are really… passionate.”

“They’re awful, right?” A light voice came from behind and Eddie turned around to meet amused eyes and a pretty smile, plus a really cool styled red hair. “You must be Eddie. I’m Beverly. You already know Ben, right?” She introduced herself, then pointing at Ben by her side. They shook hands.

“I guess it’s an acquired taste,” Eddie shrugged, although his face gave away that it wasn’t what he really thought. Beverly laughed.

“It’s not. The only reason we come here is that they have pretty great international beers. And to support Richie, of course.” She added, making everyone laugh too. Eddie smiled too, not really knowing why. What did that mean? Was Richie’s show that bad?

“I don’t think I’ve had the pleasure,” he said, and Beverly raised her eyebrows in surprise and probably amusement, looking around at Bill and Ben.

“He doesn’t know Richie? You don’t know Richie?” She asked Ben, then Eddie. “I thought you guys shared some classes. He’s talked about you a couple of times.”

“We do share some classes, I just… Wait, what has he said about me?” Eddie was genuinely curious. He was sure he wasn’t someone who stood out at all, why would Richie notice him in class?

“I mean, I think he was talking about you. You’re Stanley’s roommate, right?” Eddie nodded. Beverly gave Ben a knowing smile. “Yeah, that was you. Don’t worry. He only said good things.”

“I wonder wh-what good means in Richie’s vocabulary,” Bill joked, making everybody laugh too. Eddie was getting anxious. What was funny? What did Richie know? Was he being paranoid?? Fuck. Probably. Eddie, get your shit together.

The guys kept talking while Eddie tried to stop freaking out and Beverly suggested they go get a beer while they waited for Richie’s act. She said something about needing to get wasted to handle it. Maybe it was Eddie’s morbid curiosity, but it made him want to watch it more than he wanted before (what wasn’t particularly difficult since he didn’t want to watch it at all in the first place).

So they drank while a few more people came and went, singing, doing stand-up, playing the fucking flute, and even doing some weird improv about a funeral and aliens. Eddie had just a beer. It was a weeknight and he didn’t want to get too tipsy. He had his fair share of crazy partying back when he started living on campus, he didn’t need to prove himself he could be hardcore.

“Oh my god, there he is. Brace yourselves, guys,” Beverly laughed, and they all turned around to see that gangly mess called Richie Tozier walk on stage wearing flip-flops, jeans, a Hawaiian t-shirt, and a beanie. In the middle of December, mind you. Eddie ordered another beer.

“Have you notice how many douchebags learn to play guitar just to get chicks? Like, they heard the Pied Piper story and they thought, hey, if he could catch rats with music, why can’t I catch bitches, I mean…” People laughed and Eddie planted his face on his hands. And this was his only option? For real? He drank his beer and tried not to listen too much, but it was kind of impossible. That was a loud motherfucker. “… and they don’t even need to sing, man. They learn the three basic chords and repeat the words ‘yeah’ and ‘oh’ in a different order over and over again while closing their eyes and biting their bottom lips and that’s fucking it. The English language is just that generous. I promise you, I speak Spanish, and if you try to get chicks just singing ‘sí, sí, sí’ you just look like the fucking roadie testing the mike.”

“He really does,” Beverly said, catching Eddie’s attention.

“What is it?”

“He does speak Spanish. It started as a joke when we were kids, he used to do a lot of impressions and he had this character, Juan Gomez. Absolutely awful. He used to throw Spanish words here and there, and I bet they didn’t make any sense at first, but then he started using more and more of them, and he started watching this Mexican comedian’s movies, don’t ask me for his name. The thing is he actually learned how to speak Spanish.”

“Unbelievable,” Eddie chuckled, not very convinced. He looked back at Richie, still doing his thing up there, people laughing now and then. “He’s not that bad, I guess.”

“So yeah, I hate those douchebags, thinking they can get girls just because they can play guitar. Girls, you are so much better than that,” Richie said, hand to his heart, reaching out when someone from backstage handed him a guitar. Everybody laughed. “And that’s why this song is for you. Now, don’t get me wrong, this is not Wonderwall. I’m going to prove I’m so much better than any other guy you’ve met. I want you guys to tell me some words, and I’m going to improvise a song… just for you,” he said, pointing at the public, and Eddie couldn’t help rolling his eyes when some girls actually screamed at that.

People started yelling words, and Richie started picking them, the stupider the better. He chose four in total: table, rocket, drama, and bother. The last one was the one Eddie yelled. He wasn’t trying to be mean or anything. He was just curious to see what Richie could do with it. He seemed to like it anyway because he could have picked any other one.

“All right, here we go,” Richie started playing, clearing his throat and starting to sing in one of the worst voices Eddie had ever heard. “When I look at you, baby, I become unstable. I just want to push you on the nearest table.” People started laughing and Eddie raised an eyebrow. Not bad. “But I know you’re shy and you don’t like drama. So I’ll wait to get home and fall on your _cama_ ,” Richie shrugged. Okay, that was funny, Eddie had to admit it. “If your hands are cold, put them in my pocket. They will get warm when you feel my rocket.” The roars of laughter filled the room as Richie wiggled his eyebrows, closing his eyes and biting his bottom lip as he went for the finish line. “But I need you to tell me, baby, if this is a bother. So I can ditch you and just fuck your brother,” he played the last chords, ending the song with an: “ohhhhh, yeaaah.”

People cheered and clapped, still laughing when Richie made a bow and thanked them. Eddie was surprised. It wasn’t the best kind of humor he had ever heard, but it wasn’t as bad as he expected. It could be infinitely worse for sure. A few minutes later, Richie was walking through the crowd trying to get to them, Beverly waving her arm as up as she could so he could see her.

“I _so_ need a beer. Damn, those fucking spotlights,” Richie said the moment he reached the bar, giving Beverly a half hug and then Ben too. Eddie made a face. God, he was sweaty. His hair had curled up and some locks were stuck to his forehead. Disgusting.

“You were so good, man! The song went better than most times,” Beverly said, patting Richie’s back as he ordered a beer. “You remember Bill, right?” She asked when Bill offered Richie his hand.

“Of course. What’s crackin’ Big Bill?” Richie shook his hand, turning to the side to look at Eddie. Dammit, that close he looked too fucking tall. Eddie was used to look up to reach people’s eyes but that kind of height difference was preposterous.

“And this is―”

“Eddie Kaspbrak,” Richie cut Beverly, offering his hand to Eddie. “I know who you are. The guy who yelled ‘bother’ at the top of his lungs. Did you like the rhyme?”

“I don’t have a brother, so I’m afraid some of the deeper meaning got lost in me,” Eddie said sarcastically as he shook Richie’s hand.

“Shame,” Richie pouted. “I guess you could do the trick. Do you want something else to get lost in you?”

“Are you implying your cock is detachable?” Eddie raised an eyebrow. “Because in that case, I bet I can find something better and probably bigger.”

The guys gasped and laughed, Beverly literally bending down laughing, as Richie looked at Eddie with wide eyes and utterly shocked. Eddie chuckled, feeling a little embarrassed but trying not to show it. He wasn’t expecting to say anything like that either, but it just felt right to tease the teaser for a change.

“Can I keep him?” Beverly asked, holding Eddie’s shoulders and talking to Bill. “I’ve never met anyone who could shut up Richie so quickly. This is a gift.”

“Eddie can be pretty snarky when he wants to,” Bill agreed.

“See what you did? Now they’re talking about us as if we weren’t here,” Richie complained. “You turned us into a circus show, Kaspbrak.”

“I must say, it’s funnier than your previous act,” Ben said, and everybody laughed when Richie pretended to be dramatically offended.

They kept talking at the bar until Bill found a free table to sit at. People kept walking on stage, doing their thing, and they had a pretty nice time drinking and trashing the awful singers, worse musicians, and atrocious comedians. Thinking back, they probably weren’t that bad, not all of them at least, but that place should have a drinking restriction to get on stage because, as the night went on, the acts got more and more strange.

Eddie didn’t pay too much attention to the show anyway, he was more interested in figuring out Richie. He wasn’t a total stranger to Eddie, they hadn’t really talked before, but Eddie had shared classes with him for like three years, so he knew him a little. It was different seeing him that close, of course, and he behaved slightly different when he was with his friends and outside of class, but he mostly seemed like the same kind of guy, loud and extrovert and all those things Eddie had tried to be but never really fitted his personality.

“Gotta go drain the lizard,” Richie said, standing up. “You guys want me to order another round?”

“Nothing for me. I’ve got classes tomorrow first time in the morning,” Ben said while Bill and Beverly nodded. Eddie didn’t say a word, looking at his half-empty bottle. Richie left and the rest kept talking. It seemed like the perfect time. Eddie drank down his beer and stood up too.

“Actually, I’m going to order another one too.”

“Tell me what you want, I’ll text Richie,” Beverly said, but Eddie was already moving.

“It’s fine! Don’t worry about it!” He quickly said with a nervous smile. His heart was starting to beat up faster. He needed to get over with it the sooner the better.

As he walked through the crowd his mind didn’t stop playing all the ways the conversation could go, all the ways he could phrase it, all the ways it could go wrong. His major concern was Richie thinking he was crazy and telling his friends, the second was the school knowing, which could lead to his mom finding out, and that would be the end of the world. That was the only reason why his mom finding out wasn’t his major concern. If his mom found out she would kill him, so no need to worry about anything when you’re dead.

A guy was walking out of the bathroom when Eddie got there. Richie was using one of the urinals, so Eddie tried not to look and went to the stalls, checking if there was any being used. The coast was clear, so Eddie moved fast. Right when Richie was zipping up his fly, Eddie closed the bathroom door, turning around and looking at a very confused Richie.

“This is when you beat me up for something I said?” Richie asked. “I don’t mean to underestimate you, man, but you’re tiny.”

“I’m average size, Slenderman,” Eddie said defensively, but he shook his head. That was not the point. “Look, I know this is weird, but I need to ask you for a favor,” Eddie said, pressing his back to the door to block it. Richie gave him a look.

“There are only two things you can ask for in a bathroom: a blowjob or clean urine. I’m afraid I can only give you one of those right now. Got a little high before coming on stage.”

“I don’t want your fucking piss, man. Or the blowjob, but thanks for the offering,” Eddie added, and Richie clicked his tongue in a disappointed way. “Dude, who do you think I am? You’re the one who does weird shit like that, not me.” Eddie laughed in disbelief.

“Weren’t you the kid that got super wasted at a frat party and freaked out about some dumb initiation ritual so much they ended up calling the police somehow?” Richie asked in an amused tone.

Eddie couldn’t fucking believe it. He covered his face with his hands.

“Oh my god, how the fuck do you know that? It was a mistake, okay? I was going through a weird phase and I…”

“Didn’t you puke all over Victor Criss? Man, you are my hero,” Richie chuckled. Eddie could feel his face heat up. He wished the dim lights were helping hide how red his face should be. “You need to tell me that story sometime.”

“There’s nothing to tell. I’m not. That was. Look,” Eddie tried to compose himself, taking a deep breath and looking at Richie in the eyes (honestly, that motherfucker was tall as fuck). “That has nothing to do with what I need right now, okay? What I need is a really big favor, and it might sound weird, and I know you will judge me, but I don’t know who else to ask.”

“Ask away, cute bean.”

“You really do weird things for money, right? Like bets and stuff. Don’t try to deny it, I’ve seen you,” Eddie said, not even giving Richie time to speak. “I’ve got money, not much, but I’m not going to ask you to drink your own piss and I know you’ve done that for 50 bucks. Stan told me. So, what I’m trying to say is, regardless of how gross you can be and how I’d never want to do this for real with you, would you pretend to be my boyfriend for Christmas and come home with me and my mom?”

The embarrassment of saying that was worth it just to see Trashmouth Tozier out of words for the first time in Eddie’s life.

*

“Did he say yes?” Stan asked and Eddie gave him a dirty look.

“Don’t say it like that. I didn’t propose. And yes, of course he said yes, he’s a freak,” he answered, looking at Stan when he made a face. “I don’t mean to disrespect. I am too, I thought that was already obvious.”

“And what are you going to do?”

“We’re meeting tomorrow after class to discuss our ‘story’. I didn’t want to bring him here because _I don’t trust you_ , so we’re meeting at his dorm room.”

“Remember to put a sock on the doorknob,” Stan gave him a smug smile.

“We’re not in a 90,s rom-com, Stanley.”

However, it was not such a bad idea, Eddie thought as he walked to Richie’s room the day after. Not exactly the sock thing, but making everybody else believe there was something between them already. They hadn’t talked a lot about how they were going to do it (hence the meeting where Eddie was heading to), but they exchanged a few texts discussing how to proceed regarding his friends. Eddie wasn’t sure if they shouldn’t say anything at all and just pretend they were dating in front of his mom or if they should fake it around everybody. On one hand, just faking for the break at home would be easier, but Richie had pointed out maybe people wouldn’t understand why he was going home with Eddie then. That was fair. The other option was just faking it the whole time and pretend to be dating in front of their friends too, which solved the previous problem but presented another one: pretending to date Richie during the whole time.

“Mr. Kaspbrak, welcome to my humble abode!” Richie greeted with a bow when he opened the door. “This is my dear friend and roommate Mike. He won’t be joining us today for he is, indeed, leaving,” he said, pointing to the guy laying on one of the beds with a book in his hands.

“I am what?” The guy, Mike, made a face, looking at Richie. “Dude! You could have said something before.”

“I forgot,” Richie smiled, using his most polite tone. “Now, if you don’t mind, my friend Eds here…”

“Eddie,” Eddie corrected.

“Eds and I will be taking some affairs into hands,” Richie informed. Mike gave him a knowing look, shaking his head before standing up, closing his book and tossing it on the bed.

“You’re an awful roommate,” Mike punched Richie’s shoulder before walking out the door. “Nice to meet you, Eddie.”

“Same…” Eddie said awkwardly, watching Mike leave before Richie closed the door. “Well, that was a good start. Now he thinks we’re going to fuck.”

“You’re welcome,” Richie gave him a smug smile. Eddie took a deep breath.

As Eddie walked in and sat on Richie’s bed, a lot of thoughts went through his head, most of the questioning if what he was doing was the right thing to do. The problem was not the morality of the situation, but the partner in crime. Yeah, his friends knew Richie, and the moments they had spent together made Eddie think he was a good guy, kind of. Not a jerk, at least, and weird enough not to make too many questions when Eddie asked for the favor. He even felt offended when Eddie offered to pay him (“are you trying to make a hooker out of me, Kaspbrak?”) but he did tell Eddie he would do it in exchange for Eddie owning him a favor in the future. Eddie didn’t know what that favor could be. Richie didn’t need Eddie’s help in class, he was a pretty good student already (somehow), and when it came to social skills, Richie was better too. Whatever he could ask, Eddie was desperate enough to accept the conditions.

“So, I guess we should start with a little backstory. Like, how we met, when we started dating, all that shit,” Eddie started. “I didn’t bring anything, but maybe you’d want to take notes.”

“I saw you first day of class, said ‘what a cutie pie’, approached you, you fell for my charming ways, and we’ve been dating happily since then. Next.” Richie slouched on the bed, leaning his back on the headboard and looking at Eddie. “I’m the master of deception.”

“You’re…” Eddie started, but then he thought about it. It wasn’t bad. The vaguer the better. It was good they shared class because it gave them a solid background to work with. His mom wouldn’t suspect. “Okay, fine. No ‘cutie pie’ shit in front of my mom, though. I don’t think she’d like too much display of affection. We won’t need to do anything too difficult. We’ll keep it PG.”

“Deal. Just tell me what she likes and I’ll be the perfect boyfriend. She will adore me,” Richie batted his eyelashes. Eddie doubted that.

They talked about Eddie’s mom, his hometown, what he used to do there growing up. Eddie explained his mom was a bit of a hard nut to crack. She had been very protective of Eddie since his dad died and she could be a bit overwhelming sometimes. She was also very conservative, so Richie would need to find some clothes that didn’t scream gutter punk. Eddie offered to go shopping with him, but Richie assured him he had boring clothes too “probably somewhere at the bottom of my closet from when I used to live there”. Eddie appreciated a good gay joke, although he was not sure of in which spectrum Richie moved. He wasn’t straight, that was for sure. It did make Eddie feel more comfortable talking about some issues too.

“So no kissing, no touching, maybe holding hands but not too much, no snuggling, no talking about our future house and adopted puppies. Just a very boring holiday probably decorating a Christmas tree and eating nice food for dinner. So, like going to a friend’s house, only his mom thinks I also fuck him.”

“I’m not so sure about the fucking,” Eddie made a face, considering it. “Since gay marriage is legal, I’m pretty sure my mom expects me to wait until my honeymoon.”

“Poor lady… you’ve already disappointed her,” Richie clicked his tongue, shaking his head until he noticed Eddie’s face, looking away and gnawing on his bottom lip. “Or… not? I mean, I thought you…” Richie moved his hands, like trying to imply what he wanted to say without being too explicit. It was almost cute to see him try. Eddie shook his head. “Oh. That’s cool too. No disappointment then.”

“Oh, no, I do plan to disappoint her. Just… it hasn’t happened yet. Not because I don’t want to, it just hasn’t… It’s not important anyway,” Eddie batted his hands and Richie nodded in agreement.

“No, totally, yeah. It doesn’t matter,” Richie said, clearing his throat and thinking. “Although now it might be pretty awkward to tell you what I had in mind for today,” he said. Eddie gave him a shocked look, with probably a side of red cheeks too. “No! It’s not what you think. I wasn’t going to ask you to…” Richie got a little flustered too, which made Eddie feel a little better. “It’s just, since Mike already thinks we’re going to fuck, and we’re going to make people believe we’re dating, we could start now,” he said with an equally embarrassed and mischievous smile, moving on the bed with some force, making the headboard hit the wall.

“Fake sex?” Eddie asked, and he shouldn’t be as amused as he was.

“Fake sex!” Richie opened a wide smile.

It was awkward at first, more giggles than actual moans, jumping on Richie’s bed like they were kids, but it was like one of those therapy sessions where you start thinking everything is stupid and you get so much second-hand embarrassment, but then you join the rest and get invested and actually have fun and let yourself go. Eddie let himself go, and it was almost liberating, even if it was just pretending. He moaned and gasped and held his laugh covering his mouth with his hand as Richie did the same, the bed banging on the wall so hard the guys next door yelled at them to cut it down.

They didn’t last long, they didn’t want to brag, and before Eddie was ready to leave the room, Richie unbuttoned the collar of Eddie’s polo shirt and put his fingers through Eddie’s hair to make it look disheveled. He was already flushed for all the jumping and moaning, so his face matched the look all right.

“You mind if I do one last thing?” Richie asked, and Eddie just shrugged. He was euphoric. His plan was going better than he expected and it was just starting. Richie smiled and leaned in, putting his mouth on Eddie’s neck and sucking a light hickey on it. It felt weird. Eddie got goosebumps and a strange warm sensation at the bottom of his belly, but as soon as Richie stopped, it was gone. “Now you are rocking the well-fucked look.”

*

He was a nice guy, Richie. Eddie was glad Stan wasn’t there to see them talk and laugh like they had known each other their entire life, he knew he would get an ‘I told you so’ look. The thing was he and Richie had tried to hang out as much as possible before Christmas break just so they could get used to each other and make everything easier at home, and Eddie had discovered Richie was a genuinely nice guy, even funny when he wasn’t trying too hard. Maybe it was an act, Eddie knew that was a possibility, but if that was the case, the guy was a hell of an actor too. Someway Richie made it feel natural to just hang out together, talking to each other about anything that would come to their minds.

“Don’t judge me too hard when we arrive home,” Eddie said, looking through the plane’s window. “I promise you I hate it more than you ever could. I spent a lot of years living there, after all.”

“I’m sure it’s not that bad, Spagheddo. It’s your hometown, so I’d love it as much as I love you,” Richie made a kissy face, making Eddie chuckle and look away.

“No awful nicknames in front of my mom. And quit it for now, we’re on a plane, we don’t need to convince these people we’re dating.”

“You sure know how to keep the magic flowing, Eds.”

When they got out of the plane Eddie was shaking, but he tried to convince himself it was just because it was cold as fuck. He opened his handbag and got a big scarf, rolling it around his neck and half bottom face, getting a woolen hat with a pompon at the top and putting it on his head. It was ridiculous, he knew that, but his mom had made it for him and she would kill him if he dared to wear any other thing. Eddie huffed and gave Richie a dirty look when he heard him chuckle.

“What?”

“Nothing!” Richie held his hands up, but he was still smiling. “You look cute.”

“Fuck off,” Eddie groaned and they started walking.

Eddie’s mom was waiting for them at the terminal, right there at the limit of the security perimeter, waving and yelling Eddie’s name. She gave him a bear hug the moment he got to her side, kissing him all over his face and making him feel like he was five years old. Eddie was sure Richie was enjoying the show.

“And you must be Richie,” Sonia looked up, wrinkling her nose.

“That’s right. Nice to meet you, ma’am!” Richie offered his hand and a smile. Sonia pruned her lips and looked at him up and down, then she turned back to Eddie, Richie’s hand still hanging in the air.

The ride back home was awkward. Eddie wanted to look back all the time to check on Richie, but his mom didn’t stop talking (without registering the presence of Richie at all, of course). Eddie felt bad. It was like all the warnings and advice he had given Richie were worth nothing because his mom was behaving so much worse than he expected. He took his cellphone, typing a quick ‘sorry’ and sending it to Richie before his mom complained about Eddie not paying attention to her. Seconds later his phone buzzed and he read Richie’s reply on the screen.

_Dont ya worry eddie bear. Im fine_

When they got home, Sonia went to open the door while Richie and Eddie unloaded the bags from the trunk. Then he took the chance to grab Richie by his shirt and pull him down.

“You call me Eddie-bear again and I promise to god I throw you out of the plane on the way back.” He threatened in a whisper. Richie chuckled and nodded.

“Sure, sure! Jesus, so sensitive.”

Eddie let it go, for now. He didn’t want to be too hard on Richie. The truth was he had really made an effort to look acceptable in Eddie’s mom’s eyes. If Eddie hadn’t known better, he would have thought Richie was the plainest dude ever by just looking at him. He hadn’t brought any of his Hawaiian shirts, and maybe that would seem normal to anyone else, given that, well, it was fucking winter, but Richie didn’t care about that. He used those hideous shirts every time of the year. Eddie even remembers a time when Richie wore one of those over a sweater, so yeah, not bringing any was a big commitment. Not ripped jeans either, not a single hole on them, and he didn’t wear flip-flops either, but Eddie suspected that was just common sense.

Eddie was sure if it wasn’t because all the boyfriend thing, his mom would have loved this version of Richie. He was polite, attentive, he even tried to make conversation with Sonia, for god’s sake, and Eddie knew how tiring could be trying to talk with his mom. It was almost sad to see Richie try to look like a good boyfriend when his mom wouldn’t cut him any slack. The worse thing was probably the speech Sonia gave them the first night right before going to bed, talking about decency and not wanting any ‘funny games’. Then she literally walked Richie to the guest room and Eddie to his old bedroom, and Eddie didn’t hear her walk away until a few moments later.

“ _Sorry about everything. I didn’t expect her to be like that,_ ” Eddie texted Richie, curling in bed and feeling really bad about the situation.

_No worries, Eds. You’ll pay me back ;)_

Eddie groaned and turned around, facing the wall and covering his head with the covers. If things kept going on that way, he would own Richie big time by the end of the break.

*

Eddie really expected things to get better, for some reason. It was like he didn’t know his mom already. That woman was able to make anyone feel like a stranger. Being at home was like sitting in the waiting room at the therapist’s office, awkward silences and clearing throats. After a few attempts, Richie just stopped trying to make conversation. Not even small talk. Every time Sonia opened her mouth was to talk to Eddie, and most of the times it was to make a remark about the true meaning of Christmas and the ‘real family’, shit about how it was a pity Eddie would never experience the joy of being a father, not a ‘real one’, at least. Eddie wanted to hang himself.

“Do you think if I tell her I can, in fact, get pregnant, she would feel better or worse?” Richie joked while they walked to the only shopping center in town. Eddie had made an excuse about needing new clothes for New Year’s Eve just so they could get out of the house. He wasn’t sure if his mom bought it or she just wanted Richie out.

“Definitely not better,” Eddie considered, “but I don’t know if she can feel worse either,” he sighed, patting Richie’s back. “I’m sorry I got you into this.”

“Don’t mention it. It’s actually funny,” Richie shrugged, smiling at Eddie. “I never had the ‘hating the in-laws’ experience. Sandy’s parents liked me a lot. So this is interesting.”

“Sandy?” That didn’t sound like a guy’s name.

“Yeah. My ex. I’m kind of still into her, to be honest,” Richie made a face, looking away embarrassed. “She’s awesome. I still don’t know how I convinced her to date me for two whole years,” he laughed.

Eddie didn’t know what to say. It felt… weird, hearing Richie talk about someone like that. He felt uncomfortable for some reason. He didn’t know Richie had a girlfriend and, honestly, he didn’t want to know either. He didn’t want to know how awesome she was and he didn’t want to know if Richie was still into her.

“Well, I’m glad you’re enjoying my mom hating you,” Eddie said, trying to make it sound like a joke but slipping in some sarcastic undertone he really didn’t mean.

“Look at the bright side, this way when you actually bring a real date, she might like him better,” Richie looked at Eddie with an amused smile. “Maybe I should start being really disrespectful like, groping you, feeling you up in front of her. That way she would know what an awful boyfriend really is.”

It didn’t sound as crazy as it should, and Eddie didn’t know if he should be worried about that. It was sad and, at the same time, infuriating, how Eddie hated being home and around his mom but also needed her approval to feel happy. That was the real reason Eddie felt so miserable, it wasn’t his mom ignoring Richie or being mean to him in front of Richie, it was her ultimately not accepting who Eddie was. His mom was a difficult woman, Eddie knew that, so he could have understood if she just didn’t like Richie’s personality (although he was surprisingly well behaved), but that wasn’t the case. Eddie knew no matter who he’d bring home, his mom wouldn’t accept him because it’d be a guy.

“Cheer up, mate!” Richie said in an awful accent, ruffling Eddie’s hair. “It’s New Year’s Eve tomorrow. This open-aired event you talked about sounds fun, you love fireworks! And we can even have a New Year’s kiss, since there was no mistletoe around your house,” he teased. “We don’t have a lot of time here anyway, so _tranqui, tronco_.”

“What does that mean?”

“It literally translates to ‘chill out, log’ in Spanish,” Richie explained.

“You are so weird…”

In a way, Eddie was happy Richie had come home with him. It’s true his mom would have probably been easier on him if he had gone alone, but having Richie there made him feel better when things got tense, made him feel somehow protected. It felt good having Richie’s support whenever his mom said something hurtful, patting his back, holding his hand, even kissing his temple. Eddie knew it was part of the deal, of course, Richie was supposed to act like a boyfriend after all. Eddie wondered if it was too pathetic of him to enjoy it.

“Holy shit, Eds, you look gorgeous,” Richie whistled when Eddie walked down the stairs in his new clothes. He was wearing black suit pants and a light grey turtleneck, and just because his mom had said they needed to dress up for the evening, he had added a very pretty wine color blazer.

Sonia gave Richie a dirty look, maybe because of the curse word, maybe because of him telling Eddie he looked gorgeous, or maybe because Richie’s idea of dressing up was wearing a loose tie with a white button-up, jeans, and a leather jacket. Eddie would never admit it out loud, but he looked hot as fuck.

“Shall we leave, boys?” Sonia asked, and Richie offered Eddie his hand to take and walk out of the house.

The event wasn’t too far away, they could have walked there, but Sonia insisted to take the car. Eddie didn’t mind, although he would have enjoyed walking down the street holding Richie’s hand for everybody to see how fucking hot his boyfriend was. It was probably rude of him to jump on the back seats with Richie instead of using the passenger seat, but he was having a good time with Richie and it was just difficult to maintain a conversation when you need to turn your head back all the time.

That’s probably the reason why Eddie didn’t notice they weren’t riding in the right direction. He was just giggling and joking with Richie, keeping their voices low so his mom wouldn’t get mad, when the car stopped and Eddie saw the building through the window.

“Ma? Why are we stopping here?” Eddie asked, a bit confused.

“This is our stop, Eddie-bear. We’re attending the Watchnight Mass. It is the best way for you to spend the New Year’s Eve, honey, so you can review this year and make confession. Then we can all pray for this new year to be better, to get us clearance of mind and strength to turn away from sin,” she said, opening the back door for them to get out.

Eddie looked at his mom like he couldn’t believe it, then looking at Richie, trying to find some comfort somehow. Richie just smiled, shaking his head and offering Eddie his hand. They walked into the church together, not getting the kind of looks Eddie had been craving before but a whole different kind. They sat and listened, they sang the songs, and when they got on their knees to pray, Eddie could hear the fireworks in the distance.

*

Eddie wasn’t brave, it wasn’t one of his traits. He was a coward and he always tried to please his mom because he was afraid, afraid of hurting her, afraid of making her not love him anymore. That night, when he carefully opened and closed his bedroom door, walking like a ninja across the hallway, not making any sound at all, putting his hand on the doorknob of Richie’s room, he felt like the bravest motherfucker on the surface on earth.

“Dude, what are y―” Eddie shushed Richie with a finger on his lips, closing the door carefully and tiptoeing to Richie’s bed. “Do you want your mom to kill me? Is that it?” Richie whispered in a very funny freaked out voice. His eyes widened when Eddie pushed the covers back to get in bed with him. “Dude! For real! Is this some kind of twisted game, indie-horror movie style? Are you gonna seduce me into impregnating you and then sacrifice me to an obscure pagan god?”

“Richie, shut up. Jesus, you’re even more paranoid than I am,” Eddie said, kicking Richie’s legs. “Make room. I don’t want to _seduce_ you, I’m just pissed. My mom is an asshole and it’s clear she only agreed to do this so she could tell me how wrong I am in front of you, so I’m done being a good son.”

“We’re leaving tomorrow, man. Whatever, it’s not worth it.”

“It is. And that's exactly the reason why I’m doing this, because we’re leaving tomorrow, so she can’t actually kill me, you know,” Eddie confessed, lowering his voice more and looking at Richie in the eyes. “Tomorrow morning we both are going to come out of this room and we’re going to look like we spent the whole night fucking like animals. And I hope she freaks out so much she ends up burning the entire house.”

“You’re feral, Eds,” Richie laughed, looking at Eddie in amusement. “Anything else you want to do? I can break the bed. I’ve done it before.”

“Let’s not give her reasons to sue,” Eddie joked, although he was not fully convinced his mom wouldn’t try some shit like that. He looked at Richie, wondering, feeling the blush pooling on his cheeks. “I thought about something else. Only if it’s okay with you, of course.”

“I’m all ears. Shoot.”

“Would you kiss me?” Eddie asked, quickly adding. “Not now, I mean. Tomorrow. In front of her. Like, right before we leave or something.”

“You want me to kiss you,” Richie laughed, and right there Eddie knew asking that was a bad idea. He rolled his eyes, moving to roll out of bed too. “No! Hey. Easy, man. I’ll do it. Of course I’ll do it. It’s just a kiss, no big deal. I’ve kissed a lot of friends.”

“You sure?” Eddie asked, gnawing at the inside of his mouth. Maybe he shouldn’t have asked. It looked better in his head. Now the possibility of actually doing it was making him nervous. “Like, it won’t be weird, right?”

“Nah, man. Like I told you, I’ve kissed a lot of friends just platonically, or just because we were drunk. I’ve kissed Ben!” He said, and Eddie made a face. Ben? Who knew. “I’m totally fine as long as you don’t freak out.”

“I won’t freak out. Why would I freak out? I won’t. Totally won’t. It’s just a kiss. No big deal, no b-RICHIE!” Eddie freaked out when Richie leaned in, his lips almost touching Eddie’s. He covered his mouth with his hands, mostly because he had just yelled in the middle of the night, but maybe also because he wanted to prevent Richie from doing that again.

“See? You will freak out. You just did! Pretty convincing, Eduardo,” Richie mocked him.

“You took me by surprise! I wasn’t expecting… And we didn’t even talk about _what kind_ of kiss it would be! Like, just a peck? Something more? I mean, I don’t think I’m ready to French kiss you in front of my mom.”

“I’m not going to put my tongue in your mouth in front of your mom, Eddie!” Richie laughed, shaking his head. “Can I? I’ll show you,” Richie put a hand on Eddie’s shoulder, leaning in just a little. “It’s just a kiss. I’ll do it and you tell me what you think, okay?”

Eddie took a deep breath and swallowed, licking his lips, stretching his legs because he was feeling a little tense all over his body all of the sudden. Richie was waiting for an answer. Saying no would be ridiculous, right? Like, he was the one to ask first.

“Okay,” he nodded, trying to control his breathing.

“Okay,” Richie smiled, moving his hand up from Eddie’s shoulder to Eddie’s face, leaning in to press their lips together.

And then Richie moved back in like a second. Eddie frowned.

Richie looked at him expectantly, like he was waiting for some kind of big reaction.

“That was the shittiest kiss ever,” Eddie deadpanned. “Do you even know what a kiss is?”

“I was trying to be _polite!_ ”

“Don’t make up excuses just because you suck at kissing!”

“I’m awesome! If I kiss you for real I swear to god your mom dies in the spot.”

“I bet you just stick your tongue into the other person’s throat and call it a day.”

“Dude, you’re… argh!” Richie groaned, throwing his hands in the air in desperation. “Fuck it. Okay? You win. ‘Cause I can’t even kiss you properly now to show you how _wrong_ you are because I’m fucking pissed.” Richie crossed his arms across his chest, looking at the ceiling and huffing.

“Fine, I won,” Eddie frowned a little too, moving to lay on his back as well. “I guess it’s fair. We’re fake dating so the kiss must feel fake too. I’ll have to think about oth―”

Eddie felt the weight shifting on the bed and suddenly Richie was on top of him, each arm on each side of Eddie’s head, leaning down to capture Eddie’s lips on his. It took Eddie by surprise and that’s the only reason he opened his mouth a little, to gasp, not to take Richie’s lips between his. That was an accident. Richie pushed in, deepening the kiss without using his tongue, just making their lips fit like they were made for each other. Maybe Eddie shivered a little when Richie cupped his face with his hand, his fingertips touching Eddie’s cheek so lightly it almost gave him goosebumps. And then he felt it, the tip of Richie’s tongue touching his bottom lip, making him melt so deliciously right before Richie sank his teeth into it, biting him.

“Asshole! That hurt!” Eddie pulled away, bringing a hand to his mouth to cover it.

“Oh, was it too real for you? I thought you didn’t like it when it felt _fake,_ ” Richie gave him a smug smile.

“I hate you so much.”

*

They didn’t do it. In the morning, when Eddie woke up tangled with Richie in bed he felt embarrassed and stupid, and he couldn’t even look at Richie in the eye when he told him he better just sneak out and pretend nothing happened. Richie didn’t seem to mind, but Eddie couldn’t help but feel the flames of shame licking inside his body, mentally beating himself up for being a coward and not being able to at least do something to upset his mom as much as she had upset him during the whole break. In the end, she drove them to the airport and Eddie kissed her goodbye. Richie patted Eddie’s back and gave him a half hug when she was gone.

It felt kind of weird going back to school, back to old habits, to morning classes, to Richie not being there 24/7. They decided they should keep hanging out with each other at least for a while before they ‘officially broke up’ since everybody except Stan thought they were dating before the break. It was fine with Eddie. Like trying to quit smoking, you can’t stop right away, you need to learn how to live with less and less until it’s gone, so it was the same with Richie.

“You mean you got addicted to him?”

“You always find a way to twist my words, Stan,” Eddie gave him a dirty look.

They met at the cafeteria a lot, mostly because that was a place his friends frequented too and it was easier to pretend to be a couple in a place where it’s okay not to show too much affection to each other. It was funny to see their friends’ reactions. After all, Richie and Eddie hadn’t been ‘dating’ for long before leaving, so their friends hadn’t been too exposed to their relationship until now.

“You guys are so perfect for each other,” Beverly said, looking at them in awe. “Honestly, Rich, I don’t know why you didn’t ask him out sooner.”

“Maybe ‘cause I had a girlfriend, Bev,” Richie laughed. “Would’ve been weird.”

“Yeah, but you clearly liked him back then,” she replied. Eddie opened his eyes wide when Richie’s cheek got red.

“You were always talking about the tiny blond guy,” Ben added, making everybody laugh.

“Oh, God. Don’t remind me of the blond hair,” Stan groaned. Poor Stan, Eddie had made him help dying his hair and Stan had ended up getting one of his favorite shirts ruined. Next time they just asked Pat.

“I just thought it was cute, okay?” Richie tried to defend himself, “He looked so tiny and innocent, so polite in class. And then one day he came to class with that awful blond hair and you would see him running around campus making out with sorority girls and getting drunk tattoos!”

“Oh my God! That was just once!” Eddie quickly corrected him, and now it was his time to get all flustered. “The making out thing happened once! And I _almost_ got a drunk tattoo, but how the fuck do you know that??”

“Right place, right time,” Richie laughed.

It was fun spending time everyone together. Their friends got along with each other, even Stan and Patty joined sometimes, and Mike too. At first, Bill was the link between the two groups, but after a few days, it felt like there weren’t two groups anymore. It was just them. Eddie wondered how hard the fake break up was going to be if things kept going like that.

*

Eddie found himself going to every place where Richie had managed to get his weird stand-up show. Sometimes everybody else came too, sometimes it was just Ben and Bev, and sometimes it was just Eddie. It wasn’t a big deal, it was a good excuse to go out more and Eddie had grown fond of Richie’s sense of humor. He usually had a drink while enjoying the show, and then both of them would hang out for a while and maybe party a little if they had no classes the next day.

It was one of those days. Richie was performing at a bar and the rest of the guys had been hanging out with them too but they had gone home early. Eddie wanted to stay because Richie’s act was the last one and he didn’t want to miss it. Mike stayed too, giving Eddie the chance to know him better. He was a cool guy, not cool in the way Eddie thought Bill was cool, but really cool, in like ‘I don’t know why the fuck you hang with us’ cool.

Richie finally came on stage and Eddie was surprised how hard Mike laughed. He thought maybe Mike was just a really good friend but there’s no way someone could fake a laugh like that. He must really think Richie was that funny.

“He always checks with me first a lot of his jokes. And I don’t know, man. I guess I’m just easy,” Mike said, probably aware of Eddie’s look. “I’m laughing all the time, so I’m probably the reason his stand-up is so shitty. He needs to get a better critic.” Mike got up, leaving a couple of bills on the bar to pay for his drink. “You don’t mind if I leave, right? Richie’s act is already finishing, he’ll be here in a second. I just happen to have some kind of date? It’s not really a date, but I said we’d meet somewhere else and I just got a text and…”

“No problem, man. Do your thing,” Eddie smiled, offering his hand. “It was nice getting to know you better.”

“You too, Eddie,” Mike shook it. “Richie’s got a nice taste.”

Eddie smiled, looking back at the stage where Richie was asking for random words for his final song. Eddie asked for another beer, leaning on the bar and drinking it while enjoying the show. A girl came and sat right near him, blocking the view, asking for a drink too. Eddie thought about telling her something, but the show was already finishing so it was no big deal.

“Sorry, were you watching that?” The girls suddenly asked, “I didn’t notice, am I blocking the view?” She moved, trying to drag the stool. Eddie moved his hands up.

“No, no, it’s okay! It’s over anyway. It’s fine, don’t worry,” he smiled, and the girl changed her worried face to a smile too.

“I just needed a drink. My boyfriend is a bitch,” she said, drinking down the shot the bartender had just put in front of her.

“Maybe you should break up with him,” Eddie suggested, and the girl started laughing out loud.

“You’re so funny!” She said in a voice that made Eddie think maybe this wasn’t the first drink she has had in the night. “I’m gonna tell him!” She frowned, determined, and she almost tripped standing up. Eddie stood up too, holding her so she wouldn’t fall. She held herself on Eddie’s shoulders, trying to make her feet work. “Oh, sorry. Thank you! These heels.”

“It’s okay, I get it,” Eddie nodded, helping her stand up.

“Dude, what the fuck are you doing?” A pissed voice came from behind Eddie. He closed his eyes. This had to be a joke. “Are you trying to hit on my girlfriend?”

“Hey, calm down,” Eddie moved a bit away, but he wasn’t sure if the girl would fall if he stopped holding her. By the look on her boyfriend’s face, Eddie was about to hit the ground too.

“Calm down? Are you fucking kidding me? You’re trying to steal my girlfriend!” the guy insisted, and maybe it wasn’t the best time to argue you can’t actually steal a person, but it was the first thing that came to Eddie’s head, which was a great example of how good he was at fighting.

“Dude, I’m not…”

“Hey, babe! What’s going on?” The voice reached Eddie’s ears right before he felt the hands on his face. The lights were dim and he couldn’t see right, but Richie’s mouth was on his before he could process what was going on, kissing him overdramatically, making the girl fall back on the stool and her boyfriend take a step back. “Did you like the show? Who are these people? Hi, I’m Richie!” He offered his hand to the very confused guy.

“Oh, you’re… shit, sorry,” the guy said, actually shaking Richie’s hand like he didn’t know what else to do. Then he turned to his girlfriend. “Baby, I didn’t…”

“Fuck off, Asher! I’m done with you!” the girl yelled, taking her heels off and walking away barefoot. “Such a bitch…”

Eddie watched them both walk away, still shocked by the course of events. His hands were shaking and his skin was buzzing, he still could feel the warmth of Richie’s lips on his. He looked at Richie then, who was watching the situation like he was in a movie theatre. Richie looked at Eddie and smiled in amusement.

“You owe me twice now, I saved your ass.”

*

“So you and Richie…” Stan asked, looking at Eddie sideways. Eddie looked at him too, waiting. Stan sighed and rolled his eyes. “Are you together now or what?”

“What? You know it’s fake, Stan.”

“It doesn’t look fake,” Stan murmured, looking back at his laptop. Eddie put down the book he was reading and lift himself up on his elbow, holding his head on his hand.

“You know we need to pretend in front of people. It would be weird if we just broke up immediately,” Eddie explained.

“It’s been a month since we came back. Are you waiting for winter break to do the same shit?” Stan said sarcastically. “Just say you like each other. It’s fine. Everybody thinks you guys are dating already, what’s the difference with actually doing it?”

“We don’t like each other,” Eddie laughed. Classic Stan. So dumb. “It’s just… Richie still hasn’t said what he wants in return for doing this. And it’s not like we need to, I don’t know, make a big fuss about breaking up. People break up and they still hang out together. And you like hanging out with the rest of the guys too!”

“I’m not saying I don’t like it. I do. That’s the point. This is a good thing,” Stan tried again. “What I’m saying is you should cut the bullshit and date for real because it’s obvious you both want it.”

“We don’t― I don―” Eddie sighed. Shit. “I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want that.”

Stan gave him one of his looks and Eddie knew he was screwed. So what if he maybe did like Richie just a little? They weren’t real anyway, the things he liked about Richie, because the things he liked were the things Richie was faking. So it’s was probably just a fantasy. Richie holding his hand, kissing his temple and taking him away from uncomfortable situations, making him laugh with bad jokes and trying to improvise songs using every possible word that rhymes with Eddie, everything was fake. If Richie acted like the perfect boyfriend was exactly because of that, because he was acting.

“I need to get going,” Eddie sighed, and stood up, grabbing his bag and putting in his laptop, a couple of books, and a notebook. Stan gave him a questioning look. “We’re going to do this project together, for class. Me and Richie,” he explained, “and maybe we’ll hang out after. _As friends_ ,” he insisted.

“Yeah, good luck with that.”

“Oh, shut up, Stanley.”

Eddie left the room with a weird feeling in his stomach. He didn’t want to think about it. Thinking about it was asking for trouble. He and Richie, they knew what was going on, they had a pact, they had rules, it was all tied up and Eddie couldn’t step out. He couldn’t or he would get hurt, he knew that. It wasn’t worth it, anyway. There were too many guys in the world for Eddie to get his head worried over this stupid thing.

He arrived at Richie’s dorm floor, standing in front of his door and shaking his useless thoughts out of his head. He knocked on the door, receiving an ‘it’s open!’ yell in response. When he opened the door, he saw Richie sitting on his bed and Beverly lying on Mike’s, both of them totally concentrated in whatever game they were playing on their Nintendo.

“Hi?” Eddie called, leaving his bag on the floor near Richie’s desk.

“Gimme a second, Eds. I’m kicking Beverly’s ass.”

“You wish, nerd,” Beverly replied, hitting the buttons harder, like that would make any difference. “Hi, Eddie!”

“Hi, Bev,” Eddie answered, moving carefully across the room and thinking what to do. He sat near Richie, looking at the screen, seeing what it seemed like Pikachu and Luigi beating the shit out of each other. “Which one are you?”

“Pikachu,” Richie replied. “Shit, fuck! I hate you, Bev!” He dropped the Nintendo on the bed and shot Beverly a dirty look. “You only choose Luigi to make it more humiliating!”

“Next time I’ll beat the shit out of you with Yoshi,” she smiled. “What are you guys up to? You need me to leave?”

“It’s fine, Bev, you can stay. We’re not going to fuck,” Richie laughed and Beverly did too. Eddie gave Richie a questioning look. “Oh, she knows. About the whole fake dating thing. I haven’t told anyone else, but I can’t keep things from Bev.”

“Oh. Okay,” Eddie nodded, looking at Beverly just to see if she reacted in any way. She didn’t.

“You wanna play?” Richie offered. “Beverly is too good at it, it’s disgusting.”

“Shouldn’t we do the project?”

“It’s almost finished, actually,” Richie took his laptop from under his pillow and opened it, showing Eddie a folder with multiple documents. “Check it out if you want to.”

“But this is…” Eddie started looking at it while Richie took back the Nintendo, starting a new round. “Richie, this is perfect. You did this all by yourself. It was supposed to be a group assignment!”

“A couple is barely a group anyway,” Richie shrugged, now trying to get Princess Zelda to beat one of those Piranha Plants from Mario. “It’s fine. You owe me.”

“I owe you too much already!”

“You do,” Richie agreed, pausing the game and looking at Eddie. “And I think I know how I want you to pay me.”

“Ooookay, I think Ben is out of the library already. I should go check…” Beverly said, moving out of the bed.

“Fuck off, Bev. You know what it is. We’ve talked about it.”

“Oh, you mean the festival?” She asked, and Eddie looked at her, not knowing what that meant. “There’s this winter festival thing. It’s just another party but the mall’s ice rink is closing for the year because spring is almost here, so they wanted to throw some kind of winter-themed festival the last day it’ll be open.”

“And I was wondering if you could maybe come with me, you know, like a date,” Richie asked. Eddie looked at him, then at Beverly, then back at Richie. What.

“I didn’t know you liked skating that much.”

“I don’t,” Richie laughed.

“It’s Sandy,” Beverly said. “She does like skating and she will be there. We’re still friends with her, Richie too, but he’s an ass and he wants to try and see if he can make her jealous.”

“It’s worth a try,” Richie shrugged. “So what do you say, Eds. Would you be my date?”

“Fuck no!” Eddie felt outraged. “That’s low, and despicable, and honestly, very creepy, so there’s no way I’m going to be part of that.”

*

Eddie sat on the bench, leaning down to tie his ice skates. He needed to learn not to be so fucking easy. He knew it wasn’t a good idea, helping Richie get his ex jealous, mostly because it was a pretty stupid thing to try in the first place but also because Eddie was setting himself to feel like shit if it actually worked. It was true he liked Richie more than he wanted to admit, even to himself, and yeah, the nice thing to say is you want the person you like to be happy, even if that means being happy with another person. But come on, one thing is wanting Richie to be happy with someone else and another thing is _helping_ him get that other person.

However, Richie begged and told Eddie if he did that for him the debt would be fully settled, so Eddie counted his cards and decided it was worth playing. In fact, he had decided to stop hanging out so much with Richie after that, meet new people, prove himself Richie was just another guy. There were plenty of dudes in the sea and shit.

“Are you good at this?” Ben asked, tying down his skates too. “I’m awful. I’m just praying I don’t break any important bone.”

“Aren’t all bones important?” Eddie asked, making Ben laugh. “I haven’t done this a lot. I’m not bad a roller skating, so I hope it’s not too different.”

“The things we do for love, huh?”

Eddie lowered his head and nodded. He waited for Ben to finish and they both carefully walked to the rink and got in. Beverly was already there, doing pirouettes and smiling like a five-year-old. Richie hadn’t arrived yet. He decided he wanted to get some extra money so he started tutoring kids in his free time. He had texted Eddie saying he would be there in a minute, but that could mean anything coming from Richie.

“You guys need some help?” Beverly approached them, circling them and holding Ben’s hand. “Come on, babe, you’ll never learn if you don’t let yourself go. You good, Eddie?”

“I think I’m fine,” he said. It wasn’t that different from roller skates, and Eddie always had some natural talent for physical activity anyway.

“Come, let me introduce you to some friends,” she said, and she held Ben’s hand all the way to the other side of the rink where a group of people was talking. “Hey, guys! Ben is here. And this is Eddie, he’s a friend.” She said, everybody saying hello and shaking hands. “These are Steve, Kay, Sandy, and Audra.”

“Nice to meet you, guys,” Eddie smiled, but he couldn’t help keeping an eye on Sandy. So that was the famous Sandy, the reason Eddie was there. Something inside Eddie wanted to hate her immediately, but she seemed pretty nice and she was beautiful. He felt like shit.

“Eddie Kaspbrak, right?” Steve said. “Richie talks a lot about you. We’re studying the same major. And we play WOW together.”

“You go to our school?” Eddie asked. “How have I never seen you before?”

“Because he plays WOW,” Kay laughed and everybody did too except for Steve. “Are you friends of Richie too, Eddie?”

“Dude, they’re dating,” Steve said before Eddie could speak, and the three girls put their eyes on Eddie, like they weren’t expecting that answer.

“Oh, that’s cool,” Kay said, and Audra and Sandy shared a look Eddie was sure meant something he couldn’t understand. “Is he coming later too?”

“Yeah, I think so. He should be here any time soon,” Eddie said, checking his phone in case Richie had texted him again, and maybe to hide his face from all the curious eyes too. “I think I’m going to get a shake,” he said, looking at the stall where people were getting food and drinks. “You guys want anything?” He asked, but he wasn’t sure if someone said yes because he was already leaving before finishing the question.

He didn’t even take off the skates to get out of the rink, walking to the stall and waiting in line. He chose the stall with the longest queue just so it would buy him a little more time. He didn’t even want a shake, it was cold in there, who the fuck drinks a shake while ice skating, for fuck’s sake? Eddie sighed. He missed Stan. He tried to convince him to come along too, bring Patty, ice skating is romantic and shit, right? But Stan had plans and he said he didn’t want to see Eddie’s heart crushed anyway. Stan was very melodramatic but he was Eddie’s friend, and right then Eddie needed him the most.

Eddie got his milkshake, slurping at it and getting brain freeze immediately. It was worth it, though, that shit was delicious. He couldn’t help hearing his mother’s voice in his head talking about lactose intolerance and getting sick for drinking cold stuff. Eddie had learned to ignore it, but he still thought about all the things he was not supposed to do.

“Hey, Eddie!” He heard Beverly’s voice coming to him. “Richie’s here. He’s talking to Ben and he asked for you.”

“Did he send you to look for me?” Eddie joked.

“I’m going to get a burger or something, I’m starving. And yeah, he said to go look for you since I was already coming anyway,” she smiled. “How did you like the guys?”

“They’re fine. I’m just… I usually take my time getting along with strangers, but they seem totally cool,” he insisted, sucking at the straw of his drink and looking at the rink where everyone was. “Is that _the_ Sandy?

“Yeah, that’s her. She’s really cool. Don’t be surprised if Richie starts acting like an idiot, though. He kind of gets like that when she’s around.”

“She doesn’t seem like the kind of girl who would be into Richie,” Eddie said, and he didn’t really know why. Beverly laughed, though.

“I know, but she really matches him pretty well, like. She’s crazy smart and she’s goofy too, very outgoing, just like him. It was so much fun hanging out with them when they were together, lots of crazy stuff. It was like they fed on each other.”

“I see…” Eddie forced a smile and then drank his shake again because he knew it didn’t come out okay. He hoped Beverly hadn’t notice.

He waited until Beverly got her burger and went back together to the rink. Richie looked so stupid, wearing a really big coat and too skinny snow pants, a woolen hat pushed down to his eyebrows and a scarf covering his mouth, so the only thing visible was his nose and his glasses. It was ridiculous and Eddie loved it. But no matter how much Richie’s face was covered up, his smile was obvious, laughing and talking to Sandy like they were best friends. Eddie felt a lump inside his throat. He tried to swallow it. He tried.

“Eddie! Where were you hiding? I thought you had bailed out on me,” Richie called him and Eddie slid to his side. “Jesus, you look so fucking cute,” he smiled, taking Eddie’s face with his gloved hands and pecking his lips. “Cranberry shake? Delicious,” he said, and Eddie was glad his face was already red because of the cold. “This is my friend Sandy, you’ve been introduced already, right?”

“Yeah, we have,” Eddie answered and she did too, and they looked briefly at each other before going back to Richie. Eddie took a deep breath. It was going to be a long evening.

*

Eddie skated until his legs hurt, just because he could, and also because going as fast as he could and feeling the cold air cutting through his clothes and hair, hitting his face, made him feel free and away from the world, gave him a sense of escape. Beverly and Kay joined him, the rest only stayed talking by the side of the rink. Eddie stopped a few times, only when Richie called for some reason, but he resumed his activity as soon as he could. Skating and not thinking about Richie smiling to Sandy, skating and not looking at Richie’s hand on her shoulder, skating and hoping for the day to end already.

“Hey, we’re closing up!” A voice said and Eddie realized it was only him and a few more people left in the rink.

He got out and sat on the same bench he used to put on the skates, taking them off and putting back on his shoes. The floor felt like clouds.

“I didn’t know you liked skating that much,” Richie said, sitting by his side. “You barely talked to me at all,” he pouted. Eddie forced a smile but didn’t look at him. “We’re talking about going to a bar to have some drinks. It’s still pretty early. What do you say?” Richie asked. Eddie thought about it, looking at his shoes, tying the laces. Suddenly Richie’s hand was in the back of his neck, fingers pushing softly through Eddie’s hair. “Eds, are you okay?”

Eddie looked up at Richie, his skin getting goosebumps because of the touch. Then he looked to the other side, where the rest of the group was looking at them. Right.

“I’m fine. Just a little tired,” he said, making a face. “My legs hurt, so I don’t know. You can go. You don’t need me there.”

“Come on, Eddie. I want you there,” Richie insisted. Eddie sighed, putting a hand on Richie’s knee and getting closer to whisper.

“Isn’t my work here done already? You guys spent the day talking. She looks like she’s into you. What else do you want?” he said in a voice that sounded more tired and defeated than he actually meant. Richie frowned, getting closer and looking at Eddie.

“It’s not about that. Eds, I,” Richie swallowed, shaking his head like he was struggling to find the words. “I thought we were friends, man. I just want you to be there too. I enjoy spending time with you. It has nothing to do with her.”

“Yeah, right…” Eddie shook his head and sighed again. He covered his face with his hands, rubbing it. It was too much.

“Eddie. Eds, come on, don’t be like that,” Richie insisted, and he really sounded sincere. He held Eddie’s hand, squeezing it. “I won’t go if you don’t. Or we can go somewhere else, just the two of us, wherever you want, but I want to spend time with you today. You left me all alone in here,” Richie chuckled when Eddie smiled at last. He was so easy.

“Fuck off, Richie…” Eddie closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. “Okay, let’s go.”

“Yes!” Richie smiled big, standing up and kissing Eddie’s cheek. “That’s my boy.”

They started walking and Richie never let Eddie’s hand go.

There were a lot of bars around, so they didn’t even need to take the cars. They got in the first place that didn’t look to shady, asking for a round of beers and finding a place to sit. The beer helped Eddie feel a little more relaxed, pushing down bad thoughts and allowing himself to enjoy the evening. The music was nice and a lot of people were dancing, having a nice time. Eddie looked at his phone and saw Stan’s reply saying he and Patty would maybe join them later. The night became a hundred times better.

“Oh, I love this song! This is our song!” Beverly yelled over the music, laughing and grabbing Kay’s hand. “Let’s dance!”

Both girls went to the dance floor, not too far away from where they were sitting, dancing like that was the last party of their life. Ben looked at them and laughed, then looking at his beer.

“I need a lot more of these to do that,” he said. “Not a big fan of dancing. Not good at it either.”

“Preach, man,” Steve said, clicking Ben’s beer bottle with his. “You wouldn’t catch me dead on a dance floor.”

“So boriiiing,” Sandy complained, pushing Steve’s shoulder and looking at the rest of the guys. “We should join them,” she said, looking at Audra and then at Richie. “What do you say? You still like dancing?”

“I’m a killer dancer, lady,” Richie said smug, standing up and holding out his hand. Eddie looked at it when it landed in front of his face. “Dance, my love?”

“Ass,” Eddie chuckled, hoping the dim lights would help hide the rush of warmth that had invaded his cheeks. He took Richie’s hand anyway, following him to the dance floor.

Eddie didn’t think he was an awesome dancer but he liked dancing and he had a nice sense of rhythm, he knew how to move along with the music and he wasn’t too shy when it came to it. Richie, on the other hand, was a good dancer and knew it, and he moved for people to see him, he was a show-off because he could, and Eddie never had a better dance partner.

“You weren’t lying,” Eddie moved closer, still dancing, so Richie could hear him above the music. “You are _good_ at it.”

“What, you thought I would lie about that? Nah, man, I only lie about important things,” Richie laughed and Eddie did too, looking up when Richie moved closer too, talking to Eddie’s ear and placing a hand on his waist for a second. “You’re not bad yourself. Although I remember seeing you dancing on top of a table once, and it was a lot crazier than this.”

“Dude, how the fuck do you know that?” Eddie laughed, feeling the words vibrating in his chest and missing Richie’s hands when he moved it away. “Were you stalking me or something?”

“Steve is part of the fraternity you tried to get in. I used to hang out at the frat house sometimes, but I wasn’t there the first time. I think I had mentioned you to him a couple of times, talked about the bad dye job you had going on, then he told me about this bleach-blond guy and I had to go check it out.”

“I’m so sorry you had to see that,” Eddie laughed, lowering his head in embarrassment. The music changed and Richie put his hands back on Eddie’s waist, this time both of them, making it so Eddie could almost hide his face on Richie’s chest, over his collarbone. And he did, just because he could, not because he wanted to, not because Richie smelled so good Eddie wanted to bury his nose on his neck and live there. “My mom had just left home after two years living with me here, and I felt like I was free to do whatever I wanted, so I tried everything that came to my mind. Didn’t make the best decisions.”

“You don’t remember me, right?” Richie asked, and Eddie looked at him totally confused. “That time with you dancing on the table, you were pretty wasted. You almost fell, so I helped you down. And, after saying some pretty things to me, you tried to kiss me,” he said, and Eddie’s eyes opened impossibly wide. That couldn’t be true. Richie laughed when Eddie covered his face with his hands.

“Oh my god. Tell me you’re kidding me,” he said, probably not loud enough for Richie to hear. He wasn’t sure if that was better or worse.

“I was dating Sandy back then, so I had to respectfully reject your offer,” Richie continued, speaking at Eddie’s ear and sliding his hands from Eddie’s hips to the small of his back, keeping them there, holding him. Eddie moved his hands up to Richie’s shoulders (fucking broad shoulders, Jesus Christ) and rest his head on Richie’s chest again. He only wanted the floor to open down and swallow him to avoid the situation.

“I promise I don’t remember any of that,” Eddie apologized. “I’m so sorry I did that.”

“It’s fine, it’s okay,” Richie smiled, kissing Eddie’s temple and sighing, pressing his lips to Eddie’s hair and speaking again. “I did remember, you know? Actually… I broke up with Sandy a few days after because I couldn’t stop thinking about it,” he laughed, clearing his throat. Eddie opened his eyes, looking down at the floor, his hands grabbing onto Richie’s sweater. It could be Richie’s voice or it could be the way he said it, but it made a shiver run down Eddie’s spine, making everything feel tight. He told his heart to calm down. This meant nothing. “The thing is, I did want to kiss you. I didn’t do it because, you know. I had a girlfriend and you were blackout drunk. But I wanted to, so I thought I shouldn’t be in a relationship if I wanted to kiss other people.”

“I’m… so sorry,” Eddie muttered into Richie’s chest, not really knowing what else to say. Richie was rubbing soft circles on the small of his back, fingers burning through the clothes, making Eddie feel lightheaded, unable to process any logical thought. He was too aware of the presence of Richie’s body against him, the warmth, the smell. Eddie pushed words out of his mouth just to fill the silence. “I can tell you, my kisses are not worth ending a relationship, you know that now,” he laughed, trying to make a joke, trying to do something. Anything.

“Maybe they’re worth starting one?” Richie said, nose pushing against Eddie’s temple, words brushing Eddie’s cheek. Maybe lips too.

Eddie looked up to meet Richie’s doubtful eyes. He swallowed. Richie’s hand moved up to cup Eddie’s face, leaning down to press their foreheads together. Eddie’s heart was about to burst, beating so loud he was afraid Richie could hear it above the music, so fast it felt like it was about to jump out of his chest. Richie’s warm breath hit Eddie’s lips and he closed his eyes, standing on his tiptoes to close the inches that kept their mouths apart.

It was like clicking the right button, the one that was holding Richie’s hunger and now it had set it free. Richie held Eddie’s face with both hands and kissed him like a lost man finding an oasis in the middle of the desert, drinking from him, licking inside to taste him. Eddie put his arms around Richie’s neck, holding him closer to kiss him back, biting him because the feeling was too much, just too much.

His whole body was on fire, and every time Richie’s tongue touched his it felt like adding some more fuel to it, like stepping a bit deeper into hell. He pressed their bodies together, moaning when Richie dug his fingers into his hips, into the bone, trying to get him impossibly closer. They breathed into each other’s mouth, gasping for air. Then Richie moved down, kissing Eddie’s jawline, down his neck, biting on his pulse.

“I’ve wanted to do this for so long, Eds,” Richie whispered, biting the curve of Eddie’s jaw and hooking his fingers in the waist of Eddie’s pants, brushing the hidden skin, making Eddie bite back a moan and get his fingers through Richie’s hair to pull at him, moving him away.

“We take this just a little further and we get arrested for public indecency,” Eddie chuckled, but it was a fair warning. Richie looked at him with eyes full-blown black.

“Let’s get out of here,” he said, and before Eddie could say anything else Richie grabbed his hand and took him away from the dancefloor.

“Our coats,” Eddie reminded, although he didn’t know how he was managing to get his brain to work at that moment. Richie stopped, changing his direction and walking fast again. Eddie chuckled looking at their joined hands. This was ridiculous.

They were close to the checkroom, they both giggling like kids, buzzing, vibrating, heartbeats louder than the music and hands holding so tight Eddie could feel the future bruise in the form of Richie’s fingers. That shouldn’t be as arousing as it felt.

“Hey, Rich!” A voice called, and out of nowhere Beverly came running and laughing, getting closer to them and putting his hand on Richie’s shoulder. It startled Eddie, like he was being caught doing something naughty. He hoped whatever she wanted to say was quick so they could leave already. “You’re not gonna believe this. It fucking worked, you son of a bitch. Sandy is crazy jealous, asking about you two non-stop.”

“What the fuck? No way,” Richie laughed too. Eddie blinked, frowned, looked down to their hands. How could Richie act so calm? Wasn’t the adrenaline rushing through his veins making it impossible to stay still? Wasn’t he feeling the same as Eddie? “You’re kidding me, right?”

“Yeah, dude! I can’t believe it either. Your crazy ideas sometimes work.”

“I’m fucking awesome, Bev.”

Eddie squeezed Richie’s hands, tugging at it, just a little. _Weren’t we leaving? Aren’t we leaving? Richie?_ Richie.

“I told her you two have something like an open relationship, so you wouldn’t look like an asshole. You’re welcome. She’s at the bar with Audra. You should go talk to her now.” Beverly punched Richie on the shoulder, looking at both of them. “I saw that on the dance floor, by the way. So hot. Great performance.”

_What._

“You think so? Maybe I should add it to my stand-up,” Richie laughed and looked back at Eddie with a smile.

Eddie untangled his fingers from Richie’s, taking his hand away. His heart was still racing but this time it felt like he was going to throw up.

“So I guess my job here is done,” he said with a smile that never reached his eyes, trying as hard as he could his voice didn’t shake as much as his body. He swallowed, blinking fast. Fuck, he wasn’t going to cry, was he? Pussy. “Go for it, dude. You earned it,” he laughed, almost choking on it, patting Richie’s back and nodding to himself. Yeah, get the hell out of there already. Go cry to your momma, baby boy, you set yourself up for this. “I’ll just go to… See you in class.”

“Eddie?” Richie looked at him, frowning, but Eddie didn’t register anything else of his facial expression because his sight became blurry and he just turned around, walking as fast as he could without running because he wasn’t that pathetic. Not yet at least. “Eddie, wait!” he heard Richie again, in the distance, and then he run.

_So stupid. So fucking stupid._

Only to crash into somebody.

“Stan?” Eddie opened his eyes wide, so surprised to see his friend there he forgot he was holding back tears, letting two of them roll down his cheeks.

“Eddie, wh― Hey, what’s going on?”

“Where’s Pat?” Eddie asked, looking around desperate, shutting his eyes hard once and again to prevent the tears from falling again.

“She’s home. She said she didn’t… Eddie, what happens?”

“Did you bring your car? Can you take me home?” Eddie asked, begged. He probably looked like a madman but he didn’t care, around Stan he didn’t care. Stan was the only person he knew he could trust right now. “Please, Stan? Now. Please. Please, take me home. Stan, please.”

“Sure. Yeah, of course. Let’s go.” Stan put an arm around Eddie’s shoulder and guided him out. When the cold air hit Eddie’s face, he knew he was free to let the tears fall down.

*

Stan knew best not to ask Eddie what happened when he hit the bed and bawled his eyes out pressing his face into his pillow, punching the mattress and screaming because he hated it, he hated crying, he hated not being able to rationalize the situation and act like a normal person. He hated when emotions got control of him, he hated it because his mom’s voice came back to remind him how fragile he was, how he was just a baby and he needed to be taken care of. But he couldn’t help it. It hurt so bad he just wanted to rip his fucking heart off his chest because having a hole there would be less painful and feeling his heart rotting inside as it felt right now.

Why was it so important? What made Richie different than every other guy, shit, every other _person_ Eddie had been with? They just fucking kissed and held hands, for God’s sake, shit never went further. It was like, no matter how many times his head screamed everything that made Richie different was fake, his heart refused to listen. Because it felt so fucking real. Was Eddie so desperate to feel a connection with someone? All those years attached to his mother, hearing how important it was to have someone but not anyone, _the one_ , to be there for you and to cherish you and hold you when you feel down and laugh with you when you’re happy, really left a mark on him. Because it was true in the end, even if his mom was probably crazy, she wasn’t lying when she said everybody needs someone to love, that humans are not meant to be alone. And Eddie had tried to convince himself he was one of those people who can be happy just having friends, but deep down he knew he just craved human touch, and that’s the reason why every time he got drunk back when he thought that was the meaning of freedom the only thing he did was to touch, to kiss, to look for someone who made him feel like he wasn’t alone in the world, like there was someone meant for him, someone that wasn’t his goddamn mom.

Richie had felt like that someone. Eddie hated it but it was true. Every touch, every whisper, every laugh, and every stupid kiss felt more real than anything Eddie had gotten from all those people who said they meant it for real, they wanted it. Those were the ones who felt fake, felt empty. Richie felt full and rich and big. Richie felt like something Eddie was unable to hold inside his chest. Richie was a hell of a good actor or maybe Eddie was just the stupidest motherfucker on the surface of the earth.

“Not now, man,” Eddie heard Stan whisper. He moved his head from the pillow to look back. The door was slightly open and Stan was blocking it with his body, talking to someone through the opening. The light from the hallway drew a white line on the wall. Stan had the decency to keep the lights off so Eddie wouldn’t feel so exposed.

“I just wanna know if he’s in there. Please.” It sounded like Richie’s voice. Eddie pushed his face back into the pillow. What the fuck was he doing there? Did he follow him? Shit, his head hurt too much. His chest constricted again, like it didn’t get the memo he had run out of tears already. His eyes felt sore and dry, but they still tried to make him cry again.

“I’m telling you, this is not the right moment, okay?” Stan insisted. Eddie took his pillow and put it on top of his head, covering his ears. He didn’t want to hear anything.

“Just tell me he’s okay. I just want to know he’s okay. Look. Look, I’ve been texting him. I’m texting him and he doesn’t respond. I’m fucking worried sick, Stan! He was with me, and then he left, and I don’t know if it’s my fault or if I did something or if he doesn’t want to see me again. And I don’t care if it’s the latter, I’ll take it! I’ll fucking take anything, Stan. If he hates me and doesn’t want to talk to me, I’ll take it. But please, please tell me he’s in there and he’s okay, because if he’s gone because of me, if he’s not there… I don’t know where he is and I’m going crazy, and if he’s hurt because of me I… I won’t be able to take that. Okay? So, please Stan. Please.”

“He’s here,” Stan just said, his voice not changing a bit, totally unaffected by Richie’s speech, or at least that’s how it sounded. “But you’re not going to come in.”

“Okay. Okay, that’s… that’s totally fine. Is he…?” The relief in Richie’s voice was evident.

“I’ll take care of the rest. You can leave now.” Stan could be harsh when the situation required it. Eddie almost felt sorry for Richie, but he wanted him gone too. He needed to be alone.

“Okay…” Richie’s voice was lower now, defeated. “Could you tell him…?” There was a pause, and then just, “okay, Stan. Sorry. I’m just… Sorry.”

The door closed and Stan went back to his desk, opening his laptop and putting on his headphones. Eddie looked at him and thought about asking him who that was, maybe pretend he didn’t hear the conversation or he didn’t notice. He was too tired for games, though, so he just grabbed his pillow and turned it around, resting his face on the side that wasn’t wet with his tears and just went to sleep, hoping the morning would help him see things clearer.

*

The weekend passed and Eddie successfully ignored the red bubble over his message app saying he had many unread texts. Monday morning he honestly thought about skipping classes, but he knew that would only make things worse. Right now his emotional life was a mess, he didn’t want his academic life to be one too. Stan asked him if he wanted him to walk with him to class. Eddie refused. He was not a baby. Also, he had learned Richie’s schedule in the course of those months so he knew how to avoid him.

Stan was really showing he was the kind of friend Eddie always knew he was, making sure Eddie was okay and offering his help. Patty also came and brought Eddie carrot cake her mom had made because she was a sweetheart like that. He saved it for Wednesday. He would need the extra energy to deal with the class he shared with Richie. Stan made sure he got out of bed that day. Missing the class wasn’t an option.

He did get there late, though. Eddie never got late to a class, but he wanted to avoid those minutes before the class started, he didn’t want to give Richie the possibility to come to talk to him. Richie was there when Eddie arrived, of course, and he looked at him for just a second, just like the rest of the class, and then he went back to his laptop. Eddie thought maybe he had been worrying for nothing, maybe Richie had gotten the message already. After all, Eddie had been ghosting him for days, his texts not even read yet. He was wrong. The moment the professor dismissed the class, Richie walked straight to the door and waited there so Eddie couldn’t leave without going by his side, looking at him. Eddie took a deep breath. It was time.

“So you’re alive,” Richie said when Eddie walked to the door, standing in front of him, blocking the exit but obviously giving enough room for everyone else to get out too, for Eddie to get out if he really wanted to.

“Yeah?” Eddie shrugged, and he managed to sound as uninterested as he intended to. Richie looked at him like he didn’t understand. He looked hurt.

“Eddie, what’s wrong? We were… having a good time, and then you left and I…” Richie blinked twice, looking around like he was trying to find the right words written on the walls, like he couldn’t find them inside him. “I don’t know what happened. I don’t know why you’re not texting me back. I don’t know what I did, so if you could help me here? I’m a bit lost, Eds.”

“Well, first of all, my name is Eddie, so you can cut it with the stupid nicknames already. And I don’t even know why you’re texting me. We had a deal. I’d go to that fucking festival and the debt would be settled. I went. I did what you wanted and you got what you wanted. So, I don’t know what else you want from me.”

He was calm, calmer than he thought he would be, and his words came out harsh and cold. Richie was pale, his eyes moving from one point to another on Eddie’s face, maybe trying to get something out of it, something different than what Eddie was saying.

“I thought… We…”

“We’re not friends, Richie,” Eddie chuckled, just to let out some of the nervousness his body was bottling up. He pushed his hands in his pockets before they started to shake and gave him away. “We were never friends. We were convenient. I needed a favor and you were the only one who was willing to do it. I did something for you in return to pay you back. I used you. You used me. That’s all. It’s done. Go fucking enjoy the results with your ex-not-ex-girlfriend whatever. I’ve got shit to do.”

Richie opened his mouth but nothing came out. He looked at Eddie, pressing his lips back together. He did seem lost now. He seemed hollow. His eyes moved down to the floor, looking at nothing. Eddie swallowed the lump in his throat and tightened his jaw.

“Can I leave now?” He asked. Richie just nodded, not even looking at him, moving to the side. Eddie walked past him, keeping his eyes on the front, not looking back.

He felt a dark shadow sticking to his body, stabbing his stomach, getting around his throat and choking him. He wouldn’t look back. No matter what. It was difficult to breathe and his body was shaking. Was Richie still there? Was he watching him go? Was he alive?

No. Don’t look back. You’ve done nothing wrong. You haven’t killed anyone, no matter how much your hands feel like dripping blood.

He thought about calling his mom and telling her. She would be proud.

*

Eddie opened a Grindr account, swiped right to everyone that looked hot and available, got a buzz cut, went on a date with a guy, got drunk, made out, pushed back in the last moment, went home, punched his pillow and slept bad, woke up early in the morning and went running, running, running, running until his legs hurt, until he was ready to do it all over again. Text, date, alcohol, kisses, regret, retreat, anger, sleep. Repeat.

Richie wouldn’t look at him in class, his head always down, his eyes always away. He wouldn’t talk in class. He didn’t laugh. It made Eddie mad. So he run faster, got drunker, kissed harder. He went to places where he knew he would be seen, flirted with the first guy who would buy him a drink, stood in the front row the open mike night at the bar where he first met Richie. No familiar face stepped on stage.

“You should stop,” Stan said, sitting up on his bed when Eddie was getting ready to go running one morning. Eddie looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Dude, it’s too early, go back to sleep.”

“You already spiraled down once, and I’m not letting you do it again.” Stan insisted, looking at Eddie with a serious face. “You’ve had fun for a few days, but it’s time to stop.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Eddie lied, tying his shoelaces.

“When your mom left, you started doing a lot of shit you thought you had to do just because you could, and I helped you, and I regret it. So I’m not letting you do that shit again,” Stan said, standing up and walking towards Eddie. “These… one-night stands every night, the running until your lungs give out, the… going to places Richie used to go just to…”

“Shut up, Stan. You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I know! I do know. You’re punishing yourself. Just like you did back then. You convinced yourself you were doing it for fun but deep down you were doing things that hurt you to punish yourself for making your mom leave, for hurting her. And you’re doing the same now. And if you think Richie―”

“Richie doesn’t give a fuck about what I do, Stan!” Eddie yelled, the anger he didn’t know had inside bursting up his mouth like lava. “Do you think he cares??” he laughed. His body was shaking. He was out of control. “He never cared, okay? He just wanted to have fun! Okay? He’s goofy, he’s the fucking joker, he never means anything, it’s all in good fun with Richie fucking Tozier, and when you get a bit harsh he acts like a kicked puppy and then he doesn’t even… So what? Can’t I have fun too? Then what am I supposed to do?? Just act all normal when he doesn’t even talk to me?” Eddie felt his chest rising up and down, gasping for air, not even noticing his eyes had filled with tears until Stan put a hand on his shoulder. “He doesn’t even look at me.” Eddie shook his head, frowning and looking down, the stream of tears uncontrollably falling down his cheeks. He clenched his jaw, balling his fists. “He doesn’t care about me, Stan.”

The moment Stan opened his arms, Eddie fell into them, hugging him close and tight, letting it all out when Stan hug him back, stroking his hair. Stan shushed him, holding him as Eddie cried like he didn’t know he needed, feeling small and broken and so useless. He fell in love with the guy he helped getting back with his ex. So fucking pathetic.

“Just talk to him, Eddie,” Stan stroke his cheek, wiping off tears. “Talk. And listen too.”

“Stan, he doesn’t want to…”

“Listen. Take the day off. Skip classes and rest,” Stan touched Eddie’s hair, so short. He missed his hair. “It’ll help. But you need to talk to him. Sooner or later, better sooner than later, before this eats you alive.”

Eddie just nodded. And obeyed. When Stan tells you to skip classes you know you _should_ skip classes. He went back to bed, trying to calm down, closing his eyes and breathing deeply in and out. His body was so tired, his mind even more, he fell asleep almost right away. When he woke up again Stan was gone, probably in class already. Eddie thought about getting out of bed and finding something to eat, but his stomach wasn’t feeling right and he only had like a bag of Doritos at reach. Thinking about going to the cafeteria made him feel nauseous.

He thought about what Stan had said, about trying to talk to Richie. He knew that was probably the best, more mature, solution to his problems, but he didn’t feel mature, he felt like a kid. He felt weak and he felt vulnerable, and he felt like the right word from Richie would either fix him or break him even more. Shit, he couldn’t believe it all started because of his inability to say no to his mom. But that was the problem, wasn’t it? Eddie’s life was a mess because of being unable to talk shit, to tell the truth, to face the truth.

Eddie took his phone to text Stan please bring him some food when he came from classes. Then he saw it. The red bubble. The unread messages. Eddie closed his eyes and thought about just deleting the conversation. What good could it make reading those texts now? It wasn’t like he could go back in time. He looked at the app again. He tapped on it, looking for the conversation with Richie, swiping left when he found it. The options where there: Hide Alerts. Delete. Shit, what should he do?

“Fuck it,” he muttered, swiping back right and opening the conversation. He didn’t dare to look at first. But he had to. He had to.

_Dude, are you coming or what?_

_Jeez, so eager to see me_

_Ben is talking about the time he almost got buried alive again_

_If you’re not here in ten minutes I’m leaving istg_

_Lol_

_I’ll be there in a minute_

_Don’t be too much of a cutie while I’m not there_

_The fuck does that even mean?_

_You’re right. You can’t help being a cutie. My bad_

_Ass_

Eddie laughed, feeling his eyes welling up again when he kept scrolling down.

_Dude, did something happen?_

_Eddie, where are you?_

_Did you leave?_

_Eddie, are you okay? Tell me what’s wrong_

_Eds, please, I’m freaking out, tell me you’re okay_

_Did I do something?_

_Eddi please juts tell me youre ok I cant find u_

_Eds ill leave u alone I wont talk to u again but pls jus tell m ur okat_

_I need to kno ur okay_

Eddie covered his face, feeling something twisting inside his chest, tears falling again because that’s the only thing he knew how to do right: crying, mourning, He looked at his phone again, at all those messages from so long ago, remembering Richie’s voice at the other side of the door, sick worried, just trying to make sure Eddie wasn’t hurting. He was. But Richie was too. Crying wouldn’t help any of them.

_I’m not_ , Eddie texted, pressing send before he could change his mind. He didn’t expect the ‘read’ notification to appear so quickly. His heart skipped a beat, waiting just in case Richie wanted to reply. He didn’t. That was fair. So Eddie texted again. _Can we talk?_ And then added a lonely ‘ _Please_ ’ and waited, hoping Richie was more merciful than him.

Eddie left his phone by his side on the bed and closed his eyes. If Richie didn’t reply it was fine, but at least he had done something. He felt more relieved than he thought he would. He had almost fallen back to sleep when his phone buzzed, a new text flashing on the screen.

_The door is open. Just come in._

Eddie frowned, taking his phone and writing a reply. _Aren’t you in class now?_ He knew Richie’s schedule well enough to know he had the whole morning busy.

_Not anymore_ , was everything Richie texted back.

*

Eddie was standing in front of Richie’s door, unable to open it. He was still wearing his running clothes, didn’t bother to change them knowing Richie had skipped class just to talk to him. He just put on some shoes and went out, walking without stopping until he was facing Richie’s room. And then he couldn’t bring his hands to work and open the fucking door.

What the fuck was he going to say? Did he have any right to ask questions? Did he have any right to want things to be different? This was ultimately his fault. He started it. But because of that, he was the one who needed to end it. He moved his hand up and knocked on the door once, then twice, then he opened it and got inside the room, closing it behind him. Richie was lying on his bed, playing with a rubber ball.

“Hi,” Eddie said, taking a few steps forward but not sure if he should sit or where.

“Before you start,” Richie said, moving to sit up, letting the rubber ball fall on the floor, “I just want you to know if you just came to tell me again how I’m the worst and you’re not interested in being my friend, I got it clear the last time, so you can’t save it.”

“I didn’t…” Eddie started, but he wasn’t going to argue. Richie was hurt. It was fair. “I don’t. I just… I just wanted to say I’m sorry for ghosting you and ignoring… you. I’ve been an asshole and you didn’t deserve it. You don’t. You’re a great friend. You were always a great friend. I just… I guess I couldn’t handle the situation.”

“What situation exactly?” Richie asked, moving his hands as he spoke. “Because I still don’t know what the hell happened. And, please, sit down, you’re making me nervous.”

Eddie looked around, sitting on Mike’s bed, looking down at his hands.

Here we go.

“I just…” Eddie licked his lips, his mouth feeling dry. He tried to find the right words but it was like they didn’t want to come out. “I guess I thought I could just keep pretending and I wouldn’t… I thought I was fine with it, but when I was finally aware of the reality I was so deep in the hole I didn’t know how to come out. I never meant to fall for you, but I did, and I tried to back down, but it was too late and I just. I ran away. But I didn’t mean to hurt you, I was just trying not to get hurt myself.”

Eddie looked up at Richie, who now was looking at him with his eyebrows furrowed and his lips pressed in a tight line.

“Get out,” he said, his nostrils flaring. “Get the fuck out of here. Now.”

“What?” Eddie didn’t know what was going on. Richie seemed so angry, Eddie had never seen him that way.

“You can’t come here to feed me that bullshit and expect me to just eat it. You just can’t, Eddie!” He pointed out, using his fingers. “You can’t do that. You can’t say you fucking… like me or love me or whatever the hell you thought was a good idea to say when you’ve been _parading_ yourself with a different guy every fucking day,” he spat like his words were poison, the disgust painted on his face. “Fuck no, that’s not something you do when you love someone.”

“Well, excuse me for trying to move on!” Eddie felt offended, bringing a hand to his chest and clutching his shirt because his chest felt too tight. “I’m sorry not all of us have an ex waiting for us to take whenever we feel like it. Sorry I tried to forget about you the best way I could. It didn’t work, in case you wanted to know. And sorry my ways of coping disturbed you that much, I bet Sandy found a way to make you feel better,” he attacked too. If that was the game Richie wanted to play, it was on.

“Sandy? What the fuck are you talking about?” Richie shook his head. “I broke up with her because of you!”

“Jesus Christ, that happened years ago! Do I have to pay for that too? You already used me to get her back! What else do you want from me?!”

“Get her back?” Richie let out a nervous laugh, bringing his hands to his face, shaking his head. “Eddie, I never wanted to get her back! I wanted you, you stupid moron!” He fell back on the bed, covering his face with his hands and groaning. “It was always you… Fuck.”

Eddie looked at Richie, like a picture of desperation, lying on his bed with his hands over his face. Eddie was shaking. He put his arms around himself, protecting himself. His head felt like it was going to explode.

Did he hear that right? No, it had to be a mistake. Richie couldn’t just… he had to be talking about something else. He had to mean something else. He wasn’t. Eddie felt like he couldn’t breathe. Richie didn’t...

“What are you talking about?” He asked, his voice almost unable to leave his body.

“I wanted you. I’ve always wanted to. I… I fucking love you, goddammit,” Richie said, his hands never leaving his face. Eddie felt a cold shiver run down his spine.

Impossible. That didn’t make any sense. That didn’t make any fucking--

“But you… you wanted to make Sandy jealous, you…” Eddie licked his lips. God, he needed a glass of water. “You never said anything.”

“Oh, _of course_ , tell the guy who thinks you’re gross and he’d never date you that you like him,” Richie finally move his hands down, looking at Eddie. “Sounds so easy and like such a good idea.”

“I’ve never s―”

“You did. Right when you came up to me in that bathroom and convinced me to engage in your stupid play pretends you made it pretty clear. The only reason you were asking me was that I did weird shit, but you thought I was gross and you’d never do something like that with me for real.” Richie said, and Eddie was about to rebut him again but then he remembered. He did say those words. He did because he was trying to protect himself. He never thought it would affect Richie in any way.

“I… I’m sorry I said that.” Eddie apologized, looking at Richie sit up again on his bed, resting his back on the wall, not looking at him.

“The only reason I told you that shit about Sandy was…” Richie shrugged, taking off his glasses and pressing the bridge of his nose with his fingers. “I guess… time was running up, there was no reason to keep pretending. You were always around but I didn’t… I couldn’t…” Richie let out a shaky sigh. “I guess I just wanted to have a reason to kiss you one last time.”

“Richie…”

“I’m a creep, I know!” He looked up at the ceiling. “I just… You don’t know how difficult it is, okay? I had a crush on you since the first day I saw you in class. You seemed kind of unapproachable, but dammit, you were so cute!” he said, and it made Eddie let out a breathy and nervous chuckle. “I didn’t know how to talk to you, so I lied and said I didn’t have a pen, asked you if you could spare me one. And you did, so I took it home just so I could talk to you again next time.”

“And next time I told you to keep it,” Eddie finished the story. Richie looked at him with a surprised look.

“You remember that?”

“I gave you my favorite pen,” Eddie laughed, nodding. “I thought you were cute, too. That’s why I told you to keep it. Stan says I have the courting behavior of a bird, giving small, useful gifts.”

“I thought you told me to keep it just so I stopped bothering you,” Richie laughed too, bringing his knees up together and resting his head on his hand. “Why didn’t you talk to me again? If you liked me.”

“Well, for starters, for the longest time I thought you were dating Beverly,” Eddie said, and both of them laughed, Richie making a disgusted face. “And back then I was still living with my mom. I wasn’t out yet. So I thought it was a sign and… just let it go.” He confessed, looking at Richie. “Why didn’t _you_ talk to me again?”

“A few weeks later I started dating Sandy,” Richie said and Eddie nodded, lowering his head. Right. Sandy.

“Sorry I fucked that up.”

“You didn’t do anything,” Richie replied. “It was all on me. It wasn’t right for me to obsess over you while having a girlfriend. That’s why I only talked to Steve about it, because he’s a frat boy, so I didn’t expect him to have any morals,” he joked, making Eddie laugh. “And then, two years after, he tells me you’re running around at the frat house, partying hard. I just had to go check it for myself.”

“I still can’t believe I tried to kiss you,” Eddie laughed, covering his face with his hands.

“I had to use all of my willpower to push you away. It was the most difficult thing I had done in my life,” Richie said, making Eddie blush. “I had to break up with Sandy. She was awesome and she didn’t deserve to have a boyfriend who was not 100% into her.”

“And still, you never talked to me again.”

“I tried!” Richie laughed, rubbing his face. “I wanted to. But then I found out you were friends with Bill, and Bill and Ben were besties since they roomed together, and whatever Ben knows, Bev knows too because they’re disgusting that way. So, I don’t know, you kinda became even more unapproachable. Also, your friend Stan is scary.”

“He’s a good friend,” Eddie smiled. “Did you know he was the one who suggested I asked you? For the fake dating thing. I didn’t want to at first. I knew you’d mean trouble.”

“I don’t mean trouble,” Richie laughed, biting the inside on his lip and pointing out at the other bed with his head. “Is that why you sat there? ‘Cause you’re afraid of me?”

“I’m not afraid of you,” Eddie laughed, looking away. Richie just made a gesture, pointing out the free space by his side. Eddie pursed his lips and hopped out of the bed, walking a few steps and jumping on Richie’s bed, taking off his shoes to mimic him, resting his back on the wall and holding his knees up together.

There was that feeling, like bubbles inside your belly, growing stronger and stronger in Eddie. He felt shaky, like having bees under his skin, all of his instincts telling him to get closer to Richie, just a little, just to feel the warmth of his body, but at the same time afraid of making the wrong choice all over again. He just looked at Richie, waiting.

“I feel like I’m going to wake up at any moment, you know?” Richie chuckled, looking at Eddie and covering his mouth with the hand where he was resting his head. “I’ve missed you so much these days. I thought you were done with me for good. I can’t believe you’re here. It’s like the first time you talked me into doing that shit for you. I thought it was a crazy dream, a prank video. It couldn’t be possible life would be so fucked up.”

“I’m so sorry I did that, I shouldn’t…” Eddie apologized again.

“I’m not,” Richie cut him. “I mean, it was weird as fuck, but I told myself, what the hell? I’ll do it. And I’ll make his mom love me and I’ll show him I’m the best he could ever have, and he won’t be able to do anything except falling in love with me. I had a lot of romantic shit ready to do. But then we got there and your mom automatically hated me _right away_ ,” Richie laughed. “It was crazy!”

“She hates everyone, I’m so sorry,” Eddie rubbed his eyes, remembering how awful that went. “I tried to warn you, but she was even worse than I expected.”

“I was so pissed I had blown my opportunity. And then, the very last night you fucking…” Richie laughed and Eddie felt his cheeks burning. “You got into my bed! And asked for a kiss! After your mom had taken us to _church_ to pray for our _sins!_ ”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry!” Eddie laughed because he didn’t know what else to do.

“I had the biggest boner of my life after kissing you. I was so afraid you’d notice.”

“Richie! Oh my god!”

“It’s true! I couldn’t sleep! I was so turned on I was afraid you’d turn around and I’d poke your eye out,” Richie kept talking and Eddie kept laughing, unable to control himself. “You were so fucking… _hot_.”

“In my Christmas pajamas?” Eddie joked.

“In anything you would wear,” Richie chuckled, licking his lips and looking at Eddie. “In your Christmas pajamas. In jeans and a t-shirt. In your skating clothes… In your running clothes.”

Eddie felt the air get thicker, dense and hot, harder to breathe. His heart wasn’t beating fast but it was beating hard, loud inside his chest, making his whole body tremble. He closed his eyes.

“I just wanted to kiss you,” he said, voice hoarse and mouth watering just thinking about it. “We had been pretending to be dating for three weeks and we hadn’t even kissed once. I was not having it. No fucking way. I wanted my kiss.”

“Was it worth the wait?” Richie gave him a smug smile. Eddie shook his head.

“Fuck no. It was great for just a second, then it was over, and the rest was torture. Also, you fucking bit me,” he accused. Richie laughed.

“I’m sorry, but y―”

“Richie, are you going to kiss me now or what?” Eddie cut him because the tension was so high Eddie was going to fucking die if they didn’t do something already.

“So bossy,” Richie laughed, but before Eddie could complain again, Richie moved forward, holding Eddie’s face and binging their mouths together. He kissed Eddie gently, like it was a first.

But it wasn’t, it wasn’t the first. It wasn’t even the second, and Eddie wanted much more than that. He grabbed Richie’s t-shirt, opening his mouth and biting Richie’s lips so he would open his too, licking inside it, sucking, kissing him deep and hard and hot, making room with his body so he could straddle Richie’s lap, moving his hips to rub against Richie.

“I missed you,” Eddie said, resting his head on Richie’s when he broke the kiss to breathe, their noses brushing. “I’ve missed you so fucking much, Richie,” Eddie whined, going back to Richie’s mouth like it was his source of life, like he needed to keep kissing Richie or he would die.

“I thought you were too busy flirting around to think about me,” Richie teased, biting Eddie’s chin, kissing down his neck. Eddie’s eyes fluttered shut.

“Is this your way of asking me if I was thinking about you when I was with them?” Eddie asked, chuckling when Richie bit him. “Do you really want to know?” He laughed when Richie bit him again, harder, holding Eddie’s hips and digging his fingers into the bone. “I did, you know? Think about you. When they were kissing me and touching me, I just wanted it to be you,” Richie grunted and grabbed Eddie’s face, kissing him hard, making Eddie gasp. Eddie fisted Richie’s shirt, kissing him back, looking at Richie’s eyes. “I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t going to let any of them be my first, not when I couldn’t stop thinking of you. If anyone was going to fuck me I wanted it to be you.”

Richie grunted, biting Eddie’s lips and moving down his open hands, grabbing Eddie’s ass, digging his fingers in the flesh, pushing Eddie down and forward, making him feel the outline of Richie’s hard-on.

“You make me fucking crazy,” Richie whispered open-mouthed against Eddie’s lips.

“I was hoping to make you come too.”

Eddie laughed when Richie pushed him down against the bed, wild and animalistic, kissing him like he wanted to devour him. This was a Richie Eddie hadn’t seen before. He had a glimpse of it that night at the bar, right before everything went to hell, but it was nothing like this. This was pure want. It was raw and unfiltered. It was everything Eddie had ever wanted. Richie covered him with his body, getting in between Eddie’s legs and pushing down, pressing his hard cock against his ass, making Eddie shiver.

“Let me fuck you,” Richie begged, kissing down Eddie’s throat, sucking, biting, pushing Eddie’s shirt up to take it off. Eddie wanted to say yes, please, yes, now, but he wouldn’t be his mother’s son if he didn’t ask first.

“Condom?” He moaned, arching when Richie bit his nipple.

“Yeah. Top drawer,” Richie’s words hit Eddie’s skin, dragging them down to Eddie’s navel with the tip of his tongue.

“Lube?” Eddie asked again, closing his eyes because his sight was getting cloudy, the majority of his blood gathered on the lower part of his body, his cock so hard it was making him dizzy.

“Yeah. Yes. Everything, Eds,” Richie nodded, pushing Eddie’s pants down along with his underwear, opening his legs to expose him, dragging the back of his nails up Eddie’s inner thighs. “Although I was hoping to eat you out first.”

“Fuck. Yes, please.” He didn’t even think about it, he grabbed a fist of Richie’s hair and pushed him down in between his legs.

Richie didn’t go straight to it, and Eddie should have known that because it was pretty obvious. Richie was a fucking teaser. So he kissed Eddie’s inner thighs, soft and light kisses, almost a brush of his lips, alternating those with bites that left a mark, digging his fingers on Eddie’s thighs so he wouldn’t dare close them. Eddie closed his eyes when Richie mouthed over his balls, a hot tongue teasing, sending waves of pleasure up and down Eddie’s body. Richie left little kisses up Eddie’s shaft, making him crazy. He could feel himself leaking on top of his belly, pulling Richie’s hair up to fucking suck his cock already.

Eddie let go of Richie’s hair just to grab the bedsheets, toes curling and muscles clenching. He was so fucking close and they hadn’t even started yet. Richie’s mouth felt like heaven and hell, like everything sacred and everything damned, like a sinful blessing. Eddie bit his lips, trying to stop the obscene sounds coming out, but his whole body gave him away, goosebumps all over his skin, beads of sweat gathering and rolling down his chest.

“Turn around, sweetheart,” Richie whispered, kissing under Eddie’s navel, and Eddie really wanted to complain about the nickname but it sounded so dirty in Richie’s voice he just melted instead, moving and grabbing the pillow, pushing his face into it, smelling Richie’s scent on it and closing his eyes.

The touch should have felt invasive, so private, so open, Richie’s fingers running across his ass cheeks, his thumb daring to move between them, pressing lightly into Eddie while his lips kissed the plump flesh around. It didn’t. Instead, it felt intimate, close. Fuck, so close.

“Richie. _Richie,_ ” Eddie called, panting, Richie’s name the only word he was able to pronounce, the only word running around his head. Richie. Fuck, Richie.

Richie’s tongue pressed into him, hot and wet and feeling so deliciously wrong Eddie lost his ability to speak. He just opened his legs more, his reservations, his doubts, his shame all gone, gone, just like him. He gave himself to Richie, laying down his weapons. Eddie smiled, remembering the words the priest had said months ago at that mass his mom forced them to go: if you surrender your defenses and invite God in, he will take care of everything. Well, Eddie’s defenses were surrendered, and now he was ready to let Richie in, to let him take care of him.

“Now. Richie, now. Please,” he asked, demanded, shivering when Richie moved away and he could feel Richie’s spit running down his legs. He fell on the bed, turning back around and watching Richie wipe his mouth with the back of his hands, licking his lips and leaning over Eddie to kiss him, his lips feeling hot and tender.

Richie moved to reach for the drawer and take the condoms and lube, although Eddie wasn’t sure if he would need the latter. Richie took off his shirt quickly, pushing down his pants. Eddie swallowed, feeling his mouth go dry. Richie took the condom and ripped it open with his teeth, spitting and throwing the wrapper away, rolling the rubber down his cock. He sucked two fingers into his mouth and then brought them down, in between Eddie’s legs, leaning down and kissing him as he pushed the fingers into him, swallowing Eddie’s moans.

“Shit, Eds. You’re tight,” Richie frowned, moving his fingers inside Eddie and cursing again, kissing Eddie harder.

“You’re not gonna fit in, right? Is that it?” Eddie asked, looking down their bodies and cursing his luck. “You’re fucking huge, Richie, what the hell? Jesus, what is wrong with you?” he groaned, his head falling back on the pillow when Richie brushed the right spot inside him.

“You can take it,” Richie kissed his cheek, grabbing the bottle of lube and spilling it all over his fingers, pushing them back inside Eddie. “You can, right baby? You can take me.”

“Fuck yeah I can,” he pushed Richie back and onto the bed, moving so now he was the one on top. He grabbed Richie’s wrists, bringing them up and holding them above his head. “Keep them there.”

Richie looked at him in awe, observing every movement, every detail, like Eddie was a work of art in motion. Eddie touched himself, pushed his own fingers inside him, adding another one just to be sure, trying to stretch him as much as he could. He had done it before, fucking himself on his fingers, pushing them hard and deep inside him, but taking a cock was a whole different thing. Eddie regretted not getting a vibrator when he had the opportunity.

He held Richie’s cock in his hand, feeling the thickness of it, knowing there was no way it wasn’t going to hurt. He wanted it, though, so he put Richie in place, letting himself fall down carefully, knowing that was the best way to take control of it, closing his eyes as he took inch by inch. It hurt, no matter the spit and the lube and how fucking turned on Eddie was. It hurt but, at the same time, it felt like everything Eddie was waiting for, feeling so full, taking Richie so deep inside him.

“Oh my fucking _God_.” It could have been Eddie, but the words came from Richie. He looked completely gone. His body shiny with sweat, his hair a mess on the pillow, his hands moving to hold Eddie’s waist like he was worshipping some kind of deity. “You’re killing me, Eddie.”

“You were supposed to keep your hands up,” Eddie chuckled, shaking, holding himself on Richie’s chest because the feeling was too much. “Don’t move yet. Please. I need some time to…”

“I won’t. Don’t worry, I don’t want to come yet,” Richie joked, chuckling and making Eddie gasp because he could fucking _feel_ it inside him. “You’re not going to make me stop touching you, right?” He whispered, stroking soothing circles on Eddie’s hips. “Are you okay? Does it hurt?”

“It’s fine,” Eddie closed his eyes. “It’s not the easiest thing I’ve done, but it’ll pass… right?”

“Let me help you,” Richie said, moving one of his hands up to place it behind Eddie’s neck, bringing him down to kiss him.

The moment Eddie felt Richie’s mouth on his, the moment Richie’s arms moved to wrap around him, making their bodies touch, skin against skin, slick with sweat and so warm because of their blood rushing underneath, Eddie felt connected, he felt like that was his place in the world, the place he would come back whenever he felt lost, alone. Richie’s body and his hands and his mouth and his arms and his cock, Richie giving his whole self to Eddie, it really felt like a true home.

“Better, right?” Richie whispered into Eddie’s mouth, starting to move slowly, carefully, deliciously. Eddie nodded and swallowed, closing his eyes. Yes. Yes, fuck yes. Richie kissed his cheek, his temple, brushing the shell of his ear with his lips. “Does it feel good?”

So good. So fucking… Eddie just nodded again, knowing words couldn’t be able to explain it. He started moving too, picking up a pace and going with it, helping himself up with his hands on Richie’s chest so he could move better, so he could rock his hips and arch his back and feel his skin getting goosebumps all over because how fucking good it was, his legs shaking and his cock leaking and his nails digging into Richie’s chest because holy fucking mother of god. He needed more, he was giving his all but Richie was just there, looking at him in a way that made Eddie get hot all over but not doing anything else. He couldn’t do all the work

“Richie,” he called, his voice breathy and hoarse. Richie blinked and looked at him, like all this time he wasn’t really looking at Eddie, like ha had been lost in him instead.

“What is it? What… are you okay? Is this…” Eddie leaned down to kiss him, nodding, touching Richie’s face and making him open his lips just to get a little bit of taste.

“Fuck me,” he just said, hearing Richie curse under his breath, digging his fingers on Eddie’s flesh, holding him closer. Eddie saw the want in Richie’s eyes, but he also saw doubt. “You won’t hurt me. I promise. I don’t care if it hurts. Hell, I hope it does hurt. I want you to fuck me so hard I still feel you inside me when I leave.”

It worked enough. Maybe Richie got a little crazy after hearing that, holding Eddie down and fucking him so good Eddie had to actually focus not to let himself go, taking Richie’s wrist and moving them back up, holding them above his head. Eddie sat up, riding Richie like he couldn’t get enough because he couldn’t get enough. There was something about that, about having Richie there under him, fucking him and holding the headboard of the bed to keep himself from touching him, totally at the mercy of what Eddie wanted, of what Eddie needed.

Eddie let his head fall back, arching his back, enjoying the pleasure, enjoying the power. And it didn’t even was the power over Richie what turned him on so much, although it was clear Eddie could ask for anything and Richie’s answer would be ‘your wish is my command’, it was the power over himself, over his own decisions, over his sexuality, his pleasure, his life. Shit, he was so close. He moved his hand to fist his cock, knowing he would only need a few pumps before he spilled himself all over Richie. Richie sped up, like he knew exactly what Eddie needed and how, like he wanted to be part of Eddie’s climax as much as he could.

Eddie came, curling his toes and clenching his muscles, Richie’s name dripping down his lips. Richie moaned, moving down his hands to hold Eddie’s hips, thrusting harder, fucking Eddie through his orgasm and making him feel shaky and light. He was so out he didn’t even notice Richie coming. He did feel Richie pulsing inside him, making him shiver. Eddie looked down at Richie, not really knowing how he was going to thank Richie for everything he had done. Life wasn’t long enough.

“What?” Eddie asked when he noticed Richie’s eyes glued to him, looking at him like he was the best thing Richie had ever seen. Eddie smiled, moving down and lying by Richie’s side, taking deep breaths and trying to make his heart slow down. Richie just kept looking at him. “What is it?”

“Nothing! Just…” Richie chuckled, shaking his head. “I just… _Eres lo mejor que me ha pasado en la vida._ ”

“Come on! Don’t do that!” Eddie laughed. “What does that mean?”

“I have no idea.”

“You’re such an asshole,” Eddie punched Richie on the shoulder. “Just tell me!”

“I don’t know! I can’t speak Spanish!” Richie laughed when Eddie started fighting him and also tickling him because it seemed like having sex turned him into a teenager.

“You do, asshole!” Eddie accused him. “If you don´t tell me I’m going to assume it was something cheesy,” he teased. Richie shrugged.

“Would it be that bad?”

Eddie smiled, moving closer to Richie and touching his chest, lowering his eyes. They were still naked, and sweaty, and sticky, and Eddie should feel uncomfortable and probably embarrassed and in desperately need of a shower. Instead, he was just fine. He looked up at Richie and nodded.

“No, I guess it wouldn’t.”

*

Mike opened the door and screamed, Eddie tried to cover himself up with whatever was closer and recoiled so violently he pushed Richie and made him fall off the bed. Richie used Eddie’s shirt to cover his junk and Eddie screamed: “no, no, no, no!!” Because ew, his shirt? But also, what the fuck Mike?

“What the fuck, Mike?!” Richie screamed.

“What the fuck yourself!! Leave a fucking sock on the doorknob or something!” Mike screamed too, covering his eyes and walking out to close the door again, only to stick his head back in and look at his side of the room. “Wait, why are my bed covers wrinkled? What did you guys do?? Tell me you didn’t touch my bed!”

“We didn’t fuck in your bed, Mike!” Richie replied, standing up and rubbing his butt. “Ouch, dude, did you need to push me like that?” He said, giving Eddie a dirty look.

“You better. If you touch my bed with your naked ass I swear to god…” Mike started, but then his eyes went wide. “Is that a used condom on the floor?? Jesus Christ!” He closed the door shut and they heard him walk away cursing.

Richie and Eddie looked at each other, staying in silence for a few seconds before they cracked up laughing, Eddie covering his face with his hands and Richie getting back in bed, throwing Eddie’s shirt on the floor and putting the covers over them.

“You owe me a clean shirt,” Eddie looked down at his shirt on the floor, his poor, poor shirt.

“You can take one of mine. In fact, you can take all of them, I won’t need them when I’m dead, which I’ll be the moment you leave and Mike comes back.” Richie said, making Eddie laugh. “Good thing he was one of the ones we deceived into thinking we were dating, or this could have been much more awkward.”

“More than finding us naked and covered in…” Eddie couldn’t even say it. He just laughed again. He couldn’t believe it. “I won’t hear the end of it when I tell Stan about us.”

“Bev will say she saw it coming,” Richie said, making a face. “The only bad thing about this is not getting to tell everyone we’re together for real.”

“Cheesy,” Eddie said again, looking at Richie and raising an eyebrow. “So we’re together for real now?”

“Yup.”

“Like, not fake dating anymore.”

“Nope.”

“Like dating dating.”

“You got it,” Richie laughed.

“Huh, so I guess there’s only a question left, then,” Eddie said, looking pensive. “Would you come home with me for Spring Break? I bet the local church will offer some kick-ass sermon for Easter.”

“Uh…” Richie hesitated and Eddie laughed because his face looked so funny. “I mean, I think it’s time for _you_ to come to _my_ house, don’t you think?”

“ _Ohhh,_ ” Eddie kept laughing but he really hadn’t thought about it. Meeting Richie’s parents seemed scary. “Seems fair.”

“It’s not, because I’m pretty sure my mom will love you and my dad will wonder what I did to score with a guy like you,” Richie smiled making Eddie feel a little giddy. “I can promise you something, though. I’ll still go with you to your mom’s next Christmas, and the next, and every Christmas you want me to, and I’ll still try to convince her I’m the best boyfriend ever and I’ll even go to church and wear lame clothes. And I’ll do it because even the worst, most nightmarish Christmas is still good if I’m with you.” He said, and Eddie felt his cheeks heat up. “So what do you say? Does that work for you?”

Eddie smiled and nodded, getting closer and kissing Richie. Yeah, that was something he could work with. For now.


End file.
